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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27249514">THAT Girl</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_things_nobody_asks/pseuds/the_things_nobody_asks'>the_things_nobody_asks</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Be My Anchor [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Fluff and Angst, Gay Panic, Mutual Pining</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 00:07:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>27,912</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27249514</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_things_nobody_asks/pseuds/the_things_nobody_asks</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Catra and Adora are VERY different people, leading lives at opposite ends of the high school hierarchy. So why do they understand each other so well?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Adora &amp; Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Be My Anchor [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1989610</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>86</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>328</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hey gang! This is the Fan Request story that just keeps getting continued. I moved it here to keep the fan request thing as single-chapters. Who knows how long it will go? Not me! 🤷♀️</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dependable, Compassionate, and Hard-Working. Those were the three words written down on her ‘personality’ portion of the career path-finder assignment. Right after Dependable, she’d first written ‘competitive’ and then erased it -sometimes that wasn’t the best quality. Now it was just the three.Those were her top three ‘describing words’. Strengths. Strengths? Well...she would pretty much write the same three if that was allowed. Those three things were who she was. Adora was...steady. Yeah, that’s the word. She was constantly on the move, minute by minute, day after day. Work, school, practice, homework, sleep, repeat. She was always early, never late, and she always showed up with 110% intensity, to whatever it was she was doing.</p><p>That’s exactly why the track, soccer, softball, and lacrosse coaches all vie for her to participate in their sports. It was the hardest decision of her life to have to choose just two, but she ended up going with soccer and softball. Now that she was able to drive herself, she took even more pride in her practices because it really was all her -she wasn’t burdening her mom by having her play chauffeur all the time, or asking her friends for rides. She felt...independent.</p><p>Naturally, her biggest pet-peeves were outright disrespectful behavior and a no-can-do attitude, which put Catrina Weaver on her radar as the worst person on the planet. She was a loud-mouth, rude, crass, slacker who put people down to make herself feel big. Adora constantly went back and forth on whether or not she felt bad for Catrina. She had to be acting out because of home life stuff, right? But that didn’t give her a free pass to being a major asshole all the time…<br/>They were in biology together and Adora had the misfortune of being her lab partner for a day -just one day -because both their normal lab partners were gone. It was horrible. They’d never interacted once this year -Catrina was always at the back corner with a purple-haired girl, Entrapta, who Adora KNEW did all their partner work.</p><p>Today, all she did was complain the whole time with that stupid, raspy voice. blah blah blah. She didn’t help Adora at all with the work, and when she did, she got everything wrong so Adora just had to do it all again herself anyways. She was also just being snooty -poking fun at Adora for being on the soccer team. What was up with that? Who hates soccer? Guaahhh. So frustrating. Why was she even in this class then? She had to be failing…</p><p>After class, Adora followed her to suggest that she maybe get a tutor to help her understand better so she wouldn’t feel so behind to the point where she couldn’t do anything about it. Because she cared, right? She just needed help. That’s what Adora’s mom always said -that sometimes people just can’t admit when they need help and that’s when they start to spiral. So Adora follows her and finds her smoking. SMOKING -on school property. Adora should have known. She looked like the type of person who would smoke, in her black boots and ripped skinny jeans, chains on her leather jacket, a septum piercing. Adora really didn’t mind the septum piercing -which was strange, usually she hated when people got facial piercings -but it looked okay on her.</p><p>“Hey, Catrina, I just-”</p><p>“Uhg. I hate that name. Catra.” She took another drag and blows it AT Adora. She tries to not let it irk her, unsuccessfully. That was her freaking name after all. How was Adora supposed to know?</p><p>“Right, listen, I just wanted to say that there’s tutors for Bio in the library after school on Wednesdays. I know one of them. You cou-”</p><p>The brunette threw her head back and laughed. Adora winced -partially because she felt insulted that Catra was clearly brushing off her good intentions, but also because she was surprised by how much she...enjoyed the sound. “Honestly, princess! You are just too cute.” She feels a blush spreading across her cheeks and she hates it. Catra cocks an eyebrow at her and that makes it worse. “You really think I give a shit about that class?”</p><p>“Well...you maybe should.”</p><p>“I’m sorry?”</p><p>Adora clenches her hand into a fist. “You should care.” Catra is staring at her and Adora’s confidence wanes. This chick...“About this class, I mean.”</p><p>Catra throws down her cigarette and steps on it. Adora thinks she’s maybe grinding her boot down a bit too aggressively to be socially acceptable while making eye contact. “Why?”</p><p>“Because...I mean...don’t you need it to graduate?”</p><p>“What’s it to you?” Good question? Why DID she come out here? Somewhere in the back of her mind, she heard a voice say ‘because this girl is always alone and probably just needs a friend’. And it was true -she was always by herself. Adora heard people talking about her sometimes like she was mute or something. Some people thought she had been to juvie -Adora would believe it. Other people think she’s just weird.</p><p>“Nothing, I mean I don’t-”</p><p>Catra takes a step towards her. Adora can handle herself just fine, but something about this girl makes her feel uneasy. “Then mind your own goddamn business.”</p><p>She starts to feel defensive. Why? Why do I care what she thinks? “I’m just saying, I-”</p><p>Catra holds up a finger not but two inches from Adora’s face. She can’t help but notice the almond-shaped nails painted black. “Shh. You’ve got a real pretty mouth, Adora. Let’s keep it that way, yeah?” The way the corner of Catra’s lip curls up makes Adora’s stomach turn and she’s not sure why. She’s not afraid. “Keep it shut, or I’ll shut it for you. Got it?”</p><p>For some reason, Adora’s brain chooses now as the time to look -really look -at Catra’s eyes. They’re...they’re beautiful. One amber and gold and the other a teal-blue. The coldness there is the centerpoint of whatever mask of indifference she wears around all the time -that’s how she’s able to get around unnoticed. It makes Adora sad. She watches Catra turn and walk away -storm off, really. It was a bit dramatic to be honest. All she can think is: she thinks I have a pretty mouth?</p><p>………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….</p><p>Catra thrived in between the lines of other people’s consciousnesses. Invisibility was her security blanket. She let down her shield of hiddenness whenever she damn well pleased, and it was only ever to get whatever it was that she wanted in that moment. But now that blonde idiot saw her. Not just noticed, but like...SAW her, somehow, if that even made sense. Something about her eyes made Catra feel...exposed. It was terrifying. And now it seemed like she saw Adora everywhere she went. Sometimes she even tried to talk to her and Catra would have to say something sarcastic and walk away. On several occasions when Adora approached her with her little gaggle of friends, Catra wanted to literally run away. But she didn’t.</p><p>She stood her ground against those steely-blue eyes and said ‘fuck you. You don’t know me’. Still, there was something there, something about Adora that was just painfully...genuine. She meant every single word she said and that was a novel concept to Catra, who’s every breath was a lie. It was foreign and unsettling to experience, even for the short durations she had to endure it. It made her wary, like somehow Adora KNEW things about her. Maybe she somehow knew about the bruises left by her mother’s hand, or maybe she knew that Catra was lonely sometimes. She didn’t always like being by herself, but she didn’t like being around other people either -they were all animals. It was all just one big, bullshit popularity contest and Catra was going to lose in the end, so what was the point? She hated how fake all the preppy kids were -and that included some of the people Adora was always around.</p><p>She really only had three friends: Scorpia, Hordak, and Entrapta. All gaming geeks. All super weird. Scorpia talked enough for all of them, which was fine. Catra didn’t always understand what they were doing or talking about, but she had to admit that their chatter could be...pleasant -calming even. So she hung out with them occasionally, but it was never for too long so she wouldn’t get in trouble with her mom. Not that her friends really ever went “out” anyways. The exception was to be Glimmer Brightmoon’s party this Friday. Barf. Catra didn’t understand why they wanted to go. It was just going to be a bunch of preps getting drunk and being gossipy little shits.</p><p>“Oh, no. This isn’t her annual party. This is Adora Grayskull’s birthday party. Glimmer is just throwing it at her house -all out for Adora’s 17th.”</p><p>“Duh, because she lives in a fucking mansion.” Catra thought about that for a moment. Adora’s birthday party? “Let’s crash it.”</p><p>“Why would we crash it? We were already invited?”</p><p>Catra rolled her eyes. “Because crashing is wayyy more fun.” She’d been having a particularly gnarly bout of self-destructive urges lately -among them being getting laid. She just wanted to know what all the fuss was about. Why did people make such a huge deal about a sad, five-second hand job in the bathroom? Or sex in their parents’ bed? It had to be good, right? Worth all the risks? What better place to find a bunch of horny teenagers than a big birthday bash in a mansion with no supervision? Plus, she couldn’t wait to see the look on Adora’s face when she showed up at HER birthday party.</p><p>The last time they’d interacted, Catra had teased poor Adora until she was red as her letterman’s jacket and couldn’t hardly talk. Something about it was so invigorating. Any time Adora was even in the same room, Catra just had this urge to...to win -anything, EVERYTHING. She just needed to beat Adora, who could be kind of cute when she wasn’t trying to pry into Catra’s business or give her shit and riding her ass about things Catra should or shouldn’t be doing. Who does that to a stranger, seriously? What the hell? God she was obnoxious. Time Catra gave her a dose of annoying right back. She was going to be as in-your-face as a party bystander could be. She would be the opposite of invisible. She would be a social focal point.</p><p>The night finally comes and she sneaks out early to get to Entrapta’s house to get ready. She puts on high-waisted fishnets and lowrise jeans, an off-the-shoulder crop top and some flip flops for comfort. Catra straightens her hair and puts on makeup to look a little less...edgy. She goes with warmer colors -no heavy black lines -and is pleased with the results. She looks good. Different, but good -noticeable. She looks like she’s ready to infiltrate the preppy world.</p><p>They pull up in Hordak’s shitty Honda Civic and the VALET takes it. The fucking valet. This rich bitch lived in a legit castle house. They could hear music from inside, see bodies packed into rooms, side lit with multicolor lights.The inside was even bigger than she could have imagined. The ceilings might as well have been a mile high and they echoed like nothing else. It was insane. The four of them walked through the halls in awe, bumping into people along the way -some of which were drunk, some high, and most were just stupid. Catra caught a few guys staring at her as they passed and it actually felt...good. One guy even tapped his buddy for him to turn around and double take. It made her feel kind of...powerful? It was a good feeling, that’s all she really knew.</p><p>They come to an open room with a MASSIVE flat screen tv mounted above a fireplace showing videos and a slideshow of Adora. How cute. There’s a couple people behind a literal bar in a giant kitchen passing out drinks in plastic cups. Jesus. Catra walks up and gets something fruity and stands to watch the slideshow. There’s pictures of her as a kid mixed in with some as a teenager. Then one flashes on screen of her shirtless, juggling a soccer ball. Holy shit. She was chiseled. And annoying. Even in pictures her eyes seemed to bore straight through Catra. She takes a long swig of her drink -it tastes watered down. She’ll have to get a couple more for the desired effect: a false sense of confidence in this insane environment.</p><p>Two drinks later and she’s split from the rest of the group, feeling a bit tipsy in a familiar way. Unfortunately, she’s not feeling more social, but she pretends. She follows a crowd to a room where there’s dance and that makes her feel better -more in her comfort zone. She likes dancing, especially like this -the heat of a packed room, the energy, the way the bass feels when it makes her heart beat. Not that she ever goes to school dances -because they’re fucking dumb -but apprently if she ever did, she would stand out. It’s almost like there’s a line of boys waiting to grind on her and she’s so okay with that. This was so weird. She never thought she’d be into this kind of attention -this MUCH attention. One of them gets hard while he’s behind her and it’s enthralling. She’s never done that before -excited somebody that way.</p><p>One of the guys next to him leans down and asks if she wants to go in the pool. The pool?! She nods yes and follows him and his friends outside to a lit patio where a bunch of people are splashing about in a giant-ass pool. “Awuh, what a shame, I didn’t bring a swim suit.”</p><p>“So?”</p><p>Her little band of followers eagerly awaited her response -too eagerly. “Well, I can’t get my jeans wet or they’ll bleed.” Five pairs of eyes screamed ‘take them off’. She’d never felt so high before. Jesus, were boys always this easy? Like snivelling dogs. She could have had this much power all through freshman year. All she had to do was bat her eyes and play hard to get and they drooled over her. So this is what it’s like to be noticed? Wanted? It was addictive.</p><p>“We’re just going in our underwear.”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>Catra shrugged, suppressing the smile that would have spread otherwise. Too easy. It was a good thing she had those extra drinks, otherwise she never would have had the courage to strip in front of so many people. Also a good thing she wore the thong and bralette that she did. They looked okay together, complementing her skin tone. She must be causing a scandalous scene because she can see people behind them turning their heads to look. Good. I came here to make a scene.</p><p>She dives in with grace that surprised even herself. Within 30 minutes, she seemed to be the center of attention of a significant portion of this party. People were asking her who she was, what her schedule was, which teachers she had. The responses she got when she told them her name were priceless. It was obvious that people thought she was a lowlife on an everyday basis. ‘Oh, wow! I didn’t recognize you!’ ‘You look great!’ ‘You should do your hair like this all the time!’ These colors look good on you!’ What they were really saying was ‘don’t be yourself’. She wouldn’t. Just for a night, she would be what society wanted her to be: a shallow, brainless sheep of a consumer. But she could fit that narrative if she really tried -she could be normal, be wanted. And hey, it felt good.</p><p>Their attention was turned to the inside, where somebody came out and yelled “ADORA’S TAKING BIRTHDAY BODY SHOTS!” Everyone cheered and Catra rolled her eyes. Oh, yeah. Right. This was Adora’s birthday party. That perfect, idiotic, blushing, kiss-ass, little snoot. Hmm...blushing Adora. That’s right I came here to get under her skin. Catra had to admit that teasing her felt good. Body shots? She laughs to herself. This is just too easy.</p><p>She turns to her new ‘friends’ and says “I’m going to go get in line.” The statement is met with drunken male excitement and gossipy, scandaled gasps.</p><p>Her new entourage delivers her inside to find a short line of people waiting to give Adora a birthday shot. She’s wearing spandex and a bikini top, abs out -like a goddamn statue. She’s shaking her head and somewhat drunkenly talking to her friend, “no! He’s too harry. Girls are better. I can’t do hair.” Catra smiles to herself -she just shaved everything. What would leave those pretty pale cheeks reddest? What would leave her the most embarrassed? She pushes herself to the front of the line -or, rather, she’s pushed there by a few guys in the group. They also overheard the conversation.</p><p>“Yo, we’ve got a hairless and willing volunteer!” Catra doesn’t stop to wonder just how they know she’s ‘hairless’.</p><p>Adora and her darker-skinned friend turn to look at them. Adora gives her a once up-and-down, a twice, and then her eyes flash with recognition and her expression changes. “YOU!”</p><p>“Hey, Adora.” God, she’s already blushing. Is it because I’m in a thong? Poor, sheltered baby. Catra wants to make her SQUIRM.</p><p>“Come on Adora! Do it for the team!”</p><p>“Yeah! Do it for the team!”</p><p>She seems to think about it for a moment. And that’s when it occurs to Catra that the group of boys that have been fawning over her all night must be the male soccer team. Huh, funny. No wonder she thinks they’re idiots. Minds think alike right? Adora still looks unsure -and a bit tipsy, how many shots has she had? Doesn’t matter. She’s about to get a few more.</p><p>Adora shrugs and Catra is pushed forward to lay on the bar. The guy pouring vodka asks where she wants it and she has to think. What would be demeaning enough? Ah-ha! She hops up onto the bar and squeezes her thighs together, pointing to the spot right at the top. Some people say “holy shit” and “fuck, dude”.</p><p>Adora’s mouth hangs open. “No way!”</p><p>Catra takes the bottle from the tall boy and pours it herself. Even though she’s still wet from the pool, this is cold and shocking in an otherwise warm room. She smirks, “C’mon Adora. Don’t let it go to waste. Wouldn’t wanna let your precious team down, would you?”</p><p>The blonde is blushing furiously, clearly weighing her options. Catra wanted her to just do it. “Unless you’re just scared you’ll like it.” There’s some ‘ooohs’ and Adora’s jaw is set. Catra was expecting that -she was too competitive for her own good. She was predicta-</p><p>Adora somewhat spastically bends over, placing both hands on the tops of Catra’s thighs, which she hadn’t seen coming. She holds Catra’s stare as her tongue slides up the crease between the brunette’s thighs as she slurps up the cool, clear liquid. The sight does something inexplicable to Catra’s insides -holy fuck. Her insanely blue eyes finally lose that stone-determination as she reaches the pool above Catra’s thong and she just seems embarrassed. That ALSO does things to Catra’s body that she’s never experienced. Adora’s eyebrows twitch together and Catra has to bite her lip to keep whatever sound her throat wants to make inside. Then right before contact between the two is lost, Catra feels the blonde’s tongue dart out one more time and make contact with her already-soaked thong before standing up.</p><p>Adora’s cheeks are pink and she still looks embarrassed, but when their eyes meet again she smirks and crosses her arms over her chest. It’s almost like she’s saying ‘there!’ Fuck you, Adora. Catra wants to wipe that smug-ass look off her face -the desire to come out on top is what emboldens her to make her move and actually do something about it. She grabs the bottle again and pours the burning contents into her mouth. Adora’s confusion deepens when Catra reaches a hand out and grabs the waistband of her spandex to pull her closer -close enough to wrap another hand around the back of her neck and pull their mouths together.</p><p>Some of it spills down Adora’s chin before she figures out that she's supposed to drink it and Catra takes that as a momentary win -that and how rigid Adora is for that first split second. But then the alcohol is gone and it’s just their mouths pressed together and Adora doesn’t seem to be backing away. That’s when the panic sets in. Catra did NOT think this through. She’s never fucking kissed anyone before, and here she was, pressed up against Adora, of all people, at a PARTY, in front of a room full of people. Adora starts to move her lips against Catra’s and she stiffens with the realization of two things: One: Adora is really kissing her in front of a bunch of their classmates. Two: She thinks she likes it. Goddammit.</p><p>She pulls away angry and struggling to maintain the cool and nonchalant facade. She had somehow tuned out the chaos of everyone around them for however long that lasted, but now she was coming back to her senses and it was overwhelming. The music, the people cheering, the heat, and of course, Adora’s eyes knocking into her. Did she like that too? Holy shit. The brunette feels fingers gingerly lay over hers and she realizes with horror that she’s been holding Adora’s waistband this whole time. She lets go as fast as she can, unable to hold Adora’s gaze any longer, and hops off the table.</p><p>Mustering all the swagger she can, she says, “See you around, Princess.” dnd disappears back outside to get some fresh air and cool her burning face.</p><p>…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………...</p><p>Adora knows she’s drunk because she can’t really feel her lips, but she felt that, whatever that was, everywhere else. She’s only kissed two people before: Glimmer and her not-really-boyfriend-boyfriend freshman year, who she ‘broke up with’ after one really awkward date. Neither of them felt anything like THAT, and that wasn’t even really a kiss. It was alarming really. She strongly disliked Catra. She was petty and mean and all they ever did was butt heads. So how could she possibly have enjoyed that? And when they stopped, that look in Catra’s eyes -she was blushing too! Did Catra like it?</p><p>She couldn’t stop thinking about it. People were pushing and pulling her in all kinds of directions -they wanted her to eat and drink with them, swim with them, dance with them, talk with them. Sure, it was fun, but it was also exhausting to be the center of attention all night, to be this socially active. It sure didn’t help that every once in a while she would catch a glimpse of Catra somewhere and think about it all over again, consuming her thoughts. She’d been hanging around Ethan and Devon from the baseball team all night -they were assholes. Why was she hanging out with them? Had they ever even talked before tonight? Did she know they were assholes? They would just try to sleep with her like they did with every other girl, which is exactly why nobody really did -it was common knowledge that they were just sleeze-balls.</p><p>Over the next hour or so, Adora tries to keep an eye on Catra -for her own good, of course. It’s not like Adora stares at her or anything, or watches her dance sometimes. Sure enough, Ethan is handing her more drinks and Catra is drinking them. Ohhhh, man. This is a recipe for a disaster. He’s just trying to make her easier to handle. Part of her brain responds by flashing back to standing between Catra’s knees at the table. She already seemed pretty ‘easy’ to handle then, which was totally surprising given her usual demeanor. Would he really try to sleep with her while she’s drunk? Adora’s stomach gives a little churn at the thought. God, they were so gross. She never thought she’d think this, but Adora needed to protect Catra, or at least warn her. Wait...where are they? Where did they go?</p><p>Adora doesn’t see her or Ethan anywhere on the back deck, or the pool, or the kitchen, or the dance floor. Oh no. She starts asking people if they’ve seen either and she gets pointed in the direction of one of the guest bedrooms somewhere in the lower far wing of the house. Great. Adora starts opening doors, which she knows are supposed to be empty, but somehow manages to walk in on three couples -none of which are who she’s looking for. Then, finally, the last door on the right before the laundry room. Ethan has Catra backed up against the wall next to the bed, arms trapping her there -he dwarfs her, at least a foot taller. They both turn to look at her and Adora freezes.</p><p>Catra is afraid. She immediately masks it -something Adora now understood she made a regular habit of doing, shielding every other emotion with a shell of indifference. But Adora saw it. She feels her blood boil. Ethan doesn’t move, just stands there looking at her, annoyed. “Uh, do you mind? We’re kind of busy here, Adora.”</p><p>“Get out.” The harshness in her own voice surprised herself for a moment. She’d felt pretty drunk just a few seconds ago, but now it was like her fight-or-flight instincts were kicking in.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Get the fuck out of here, Ethan.” He doesn’t move, but makes a face.</p><p>“Look, I-”</p><p>“Now, Ethan. I need to talk to my friend.” She doesn’t know where the word comes from, but it doesn’t sound foreign.</p><p>He lets his hands slide down the wall, uncaging Catra, whose eyes show a flash of relief as he starts walking towards Adora and the door. “‘n bitches…” he grumbles as he flips his hat the other way and walks out, leaving them alone in the near silence -the only other sound for a moment is distant music and laughing. Adora closes the door.</p><p>It doesn’t take long for Catra’s usual hostility to return. She stands with one hand on her hip, now wearing her jeans again, but still no shirt. “We are definitely not friends.”</p><p>“No, but I still wouldn’t want you to be taken advantage of by Ethan D’arby.”</p><p>“Well, I would. So...thanks, for that.”</p><p>Adora just watches her, trying to get a read. “What?”</p><p>“You heard me.” Catra’s just being combative.</p><p>“You wanted to let Ethan D’arby get you sloppy drunk and then sleep with him?”</p><p>Catra frowned. “Fuck you. I’m not sloppy drunk.” But as she said it, she wobbled a little bit and Adora simply raised an eyebrow. Catra understood and narrowed her eyes. “Fuck off. I’m just trying to have some fun. Besides, like you have room to talk.”</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>“How many body shots did you take, oh-righteous-one?”</p><p>UGH. Why was Catra like this? “I probably have a higher tolerance than you.”</p><p>“Bullshit.”</p><p>“Is not. I’m bigger.”</p><p>“By what, like three inches? Bid deal.”</p><p>“It makes a difference! Besides, I’M not the one Ethan has been stalking all night.”</p><p>“Stalking?” Catra scoffed. “What, have you been watching me all night? Sounds like YOU’RE the one doing the stalking, creep.”</p><p>Adora’s cheeks turn pink. “What? No, I just meant-” She makes a noise of frustration. “I just mean even if your tolerance was better than mine, which it’s not, it wouldn’t matter because I’m not trying to hook up with random people in somebody else’s house.”</p><p>“Well I was, and now he’s gone and you owe me.” She takes a step forward towards Adora and Catra’s irritation seems to have instantaneously melted into something else. Adora’s small anger-inspired adrenalin rush must have ended because she suddenly feels kind of limp and shaky just standing in place as Catra’s eyes draw her in as she approaches.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“You owe me.”</p><p>“Owe you what?” The question slips out before Adora realizes that she’s afraid of the answer and still very intoxicated.</p><p>“What do you think, princess?” In this light and from this distance, Adora can see that Catra has freckles on the bridge of her nose -she’s never noticed that before. Adora just looks at her, shakes her head and shrugs.</p><p>“I dunno.”</p><p>A smirk plays at the corner of the brunette’s pretty lips -pretty? -and she starts to circle around behind Adora, making her nervous. Catra’s voice is like hot liquid -it warms Adora from the inside out. So why does she have goosebumps? “Think about it. I came here tonight to get laid, and you just cock-blocked me. What do you think I want?”</p><p>Adora swallows. Was she crazy, or was Catra hinting at what she thought she was hinting at? She’s just baiting me, right? Adora had never had sex before, and she’d certainly never thought about it with a girl before. Well...that’s not...entirely true. She’d for sure never thought about Catra before though. “Uh…” But now she’s thinking about that kind-of, sort-of kiss they had and she swallows harder than she meant to. Catra hears it and she wishes she could run away. But she can’t back down now -she’s got to stand her ground.</p><p>“Come on, Adora. I know that little brain of yours gets exercise. You can figure it out.” For some reason the way Catra said ‘Adora’ seemed to scramble the rest of her thoughts. She could feel the other girl close behind her, and as she saunters around to the front again, she drags her nails gently down Adora’s bare arm. It delivers a shock down her spine and Adora shudders under the light touch. Goddamn. What is happening right now?</p><p>Catra stops a few mere inches in front of her. “Let me put it to you this way, princess. I will be getting off before I leave here tonight. So, you can either leave me to my own entertainment vices tonight, or…” she leans in and smiles, lowering her voice to an unbearable rasp. “...you can just...entertain me yourself.” At first she’s shocked, watching Catra with her mouth open, unsure of how she should possibly respond to that kind of invitation. “So, what’s it gonna be?”</p><p>Adora takes a step back, confused both by the depth of her own curiosity and the recklessness of this girl. Regardless, she knows it would be a bad idea right now. Neither of them are in their right minds...right? This was crazy. They practically hated each other. "Look...I was just trying to help you out tonight. Do whatever you want..." and she left Catra alone in the room. She didn't see her for the rest of the night, but she couldn't stop thinking about her -the way she smelled like perfume and chlorine, that gleam in her eyes, her lips. Adora fell asleep that night on Glimmer's floor wondering what it could have been like if she'd stayed...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Finding Love in Unusual Places</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Adora and Catra have an unexpected run-in and learn a great deal more about each other.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This one is so freakin sweet. I can't stand it.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>At this point, Catra doesn’t know what she hopes for more: that Adora really is into her and would try something, or that she isn’t and she’ll finally leave her the fuck alone. One thing is for certain though: having perfect, articulate Adora up close and fumbling with her own words was empowering -and maddening. She literally was perfect and it was a little ridiculous People were supposed to get uglier the closer you got to them -you’d see all the little pimples, scars, whatever - but Adora was just...like...stupid attractive. </p>

<p>Square jawed, strong cheekbones, big blue eyes that pulled you in, flawless skin, and her lips…Catra found herself more than a little disappointed when Adora walked away. For just a moment she thought Adora might actually kiss her, but it only deflated her slightly when she didn’t. Because regardless of how it ended, tonight had been...tonight had been incredible. She felt like she was on top of the world -like she belonged somewhere and she knew her place with all of these strangers. It definitely felt good to be the center of attention, and it sure as shit made her excited to goad Adora like that. Maybe she was bi? Oh, her mother would love that. </p>

<p>When the clock struck twelve and Entrapta insisted on going back, her chariot turned into a pumpkin and she had to go home to a silent and dark house. The stillness was deafening in contrast to the hustle and bustle of this castle full of warm bodies, movement, and sound. The emptiness of it echoed through the halls like some dissonant sound, off-putting in a barely-perceptible tone except to a trained ear. Catra was very used to the sounds of this house -or lack thereof. For the most part, anyways -there were some things nobody could get used to. So tonight she’s thankful that it is completely silent, because it means her alcoholic mother is asleep somewhere, unable to punish her for being late, or being born, or any other punishable offense.</p>

<p>She’s not sure what exactly she was expecting upon returning to school after such an invigorating night, but slipping back into the shadows wasn’t it. Which...was dumb. She should have expected that. She knew it was a one time thing while she was there. Still...there was some part of her that somehow hoped people would...keep noticing? </p>

<p>No, never mind. She didn’t want people to try and change her. She still thought they were all stupid. God, and of course, the ONE person who did continue to give her attention was the one person she wanted nothing to do with. It’s not that Adora has ever even done anything to her -her presence is just obnoxious. She’s too happy, too peppy, too...good. It's like walking around in bright-ass sunlight with a hangover. She shines so bright it hurts your whole existence. Catra doesn’t care to spend too much time thinking about why exactly that is. She’s certain it’s because nothing can compare to that inherent light, and she really doesn’t need more reasons to wish she could be somebody else.</p><p>At any rate, Adora continues even more frequently to try and engage her with awkward forced conversation and she hates it. She knows the only reason Adora is talking to her is out of pity -she can see it reflected in those eyes. They were relentless in trying to pick Catra apart from a distance at every encounter for the next two weeks. Catra found herself constantly shifting back and forth between fantasies of kissing Adora and fantasies of shoving her into a wall the next time she came within reach -either way she wanted to take Adora’s breath away. And then at some point the two merged and it was worse -then all she could think about was shoving Adora into a wall AND kissing her there until neither one of them could breathe. God, she really must be lonely -pathetic.</p><p>After one particularly long night of getting yelled at and dodging half-drunk bottles and cans thrown across a room, the want for more than her life could currently give got the better of her. Catra wanted it back. Whatever she had that night at the party, she needed it back. That power. That control. If she could be that person -that confident person, unafraid to take risks and able to bring shock and awe- she could get through anything.</p><p>The next day, she gets up extra early to curl her hair and put on her makeup. She removes her fake septum ring and puts it on her nostril instead -that was the more conventional nose piercing of choice these days. She makes her eyebrows look a little sharper than usual, ditches the combat boots and wears some high waisted jeans and a cropped sweater she made herself. She keeps the finger rings and puts on her regular Converse, checking herself out in the dingy full mirror against her door. The person staring back at her was fierce, commanded respect - had no fear. She said, ‘look at me’.</p><p>And people did. Again, she found herself being stared at, whispered about. Some of it was probably bad but she didn’t care. At least people noticed. There was something about having her name in other people’s mouths that was just...so good. Adora was watching her too, from across the room in biology. Good. It’s kind of thrilling to think Adora might actually be interested in her the same way she -wait. The same way she was? Shit. Was she really into her like that?</p><p>She thinks about it...yes. Lean, long legs, ripped core, beautiful hair, those eyes...what the fuck? Okay, so Adora was kind of hot. So what? It’s not like Catra was into her personality or anything. She was such a stick in the mud. A goody-two-shoes who got everything she wanted, teacher’s pet, best friends with actual capitalistic royalty. She was nice, sure, but she was a sheep by association with the rest of her dumb preppy friends. Whatever. No matter what else, teasing her felt good, so she was going to do it.</p><p>She let the shoulder of her sweatshirt fall down -way down-and she could practically feel Adora’s eyes trace the skin there. She bites the end of her pencil and tries to look somewhat focused, or at the very least, to not smile and show triumph. Until, finally, she thinks she can manage to play dumb and keep a straight face. She lifts her gaze to Adora’s, which she knows is there, and sure enough, Adora freezes, caught like a deer in headlights. A blush creeps up to her cheeks and her ears and Catra lets just the slightest grin through with a wink. Adora looks away quickly and avoids eye contact for the rest of class. Catra feels proud of herself.</p><p>When the bell rings and they go to lunch, Catra and Entrapta go to sit together outside at the far end of the stadium bleachers. There’s a bunch of people doing PE still, Adora and a friend are passing a soccer ball around. Catra watches how graceful she seems to be -how she can use any part of her body to control the ball. There’s a moment where she looks up her and Catra pretends to not have made eye contact. Something about the softness there frightened her again, even from a field away -it was intense. What was she thinking about? Does she know I’m watching her? Does she care? Is that weird? Wait, why do I care? Why am I thinking about her at all?</p><p>Catra spirals into a sea of questions over the next thirty minutes, letting Entrapta’s babble about some kind of video game modification, code-number-something...When the bell rings, she slowly makes her way to the bathroom. She had history next -barf. It was the actual worst. Her teacher had the vocal range consisting of one singular, drawling note that made time itself slow down. She takes her time in the bathroom, reading the new writings on the stall walls and refreshing an old “fuck this school” she wrote a few months ago with sharpie. Two girls noisily bust in and Catra rolls her eyes. She can tell by just the tone of their voices that she’s going to wish she was deaf for the next two minutes before they leave.</p><p>But then she starts to pay attention to what those obnoxious voices are actually saying. “Who, Adora?”</p><p>“I kind of think she’s...you know...”</p><p>The girl with dark grey shoes is staring at herself in the mirror. Catra pulls her feet up, thinking they wouldn’t have noticed her yet.</p><p>“What?’</p><p>“Into girls.” The word ‘girls’ rings in her head a bit longer than other sounds usually do.</p><p>There’s a gasp. “Really? She doesn’t look like she would be.” Catra scoffs internally at the remark. Stupid.</p><p>“I mean, she did say she would only take body shots off of girls at her birthday.”</p><p>“Oh yea, that was so funny. She got kind of crazy.”</p><p>“Yeah, I guess she’s never gone out with anyone either...huh.”</p><p>“She’s, like, so nice though. So sweet.”</p><p>“Totally. So sweet.” Of course. Even the gossip about Adora is nice bullshit. Does anyone in the entire world dislike her? No. The thought surprises her. She thought SHE disliked Adora but...guess not.</p><p>“I don’t know how she does it all. Especially with her mom and everything.” Her mom?</p><p>“I know, right? I can barely manage pre-calc, let alone paying rent.” What’s that supposed to mean?</p><p>“I’ve heard colon cancer is supposed to be really bad.” Who has cancer?</p><p>“Yeah, I know.”</p><p>“Do you think she ever sleeps?”</p><p>“Probably not if she gets to drink that coffee all day.”</p><p>“Can you blame her? Ohmigod, soooo good. I always tip well when I go there.”</p><p>“Hurry up, we’re gonna be late!”</p><p>“Almost -done!”</p><p>The girls leave and Catra finally sets her feet down, somewhat confused, but more than anything -curious. Maddeningly so. She had a lot of questions, and a fair amount of something else she recognized all too well: guilt. Adora’s mom had colon cancer? How bad was it? How old was she? Where was her dad? What did they mean about paying rent?</p><p>She’s not sure why, but the questions swirling in her head prompt her to stay after school to watch Adora practice. It’s not like she has anything better to do right? She watches from the safety of underneath the bleachers, under the gum and beer cans and all the rest of the unseen unpleasantries that lie around this campus unnoticed by anyone but her. What the other girls said stuck in her head. ‘Do you think she ever sleeps?’ Catra watches her for any sign of tiredness, any sign of imperfection, but there was none. She was either determined and steady, raw power on the field, or she was smiling and joking with her teammates, making them laugh. Sometimes she was both. But never once did it look like she was anything other than perfectly content to be where she was, doing what she was doing, lifting the other people up around her.</p><p>Catra waited. And waited. It wasn’t until practice was over, it was dark, and Adora was out of -almost - everyone’s sight that she finally sees it: a singular moment of mortality. Adora gets to her car, unlocks it, and stops. Just for a moment, Adora’s head falls forward and Catra sees those proud shoulders slump as her forehead rests gently against the window -just long enough to take a breath.</p><p>Something tugs hard at Catra’s heart at the sight and she wants nothing more than to know what Adora is thinking right now, what’s making her hang her head like that, what’s fatiguing this seemingly inhuman force of good-nature. In that moment Catra understood that she was wrong. Life didn’t hand Adora anything -she worked for it. Worked her ass off every day. Standing there, Catra saw a girl who carried the weight of the world on her shoulders, and who somehow harbored no anger or resentment for it -unlike herself. So...yeah, Adora really was fucking perfect. Great. She watches the blonde take a big inhale, straighten up and get in her car to drive off like that moment never happened.</p><p>Catra walks home alone under the darkening sky. She takes a few new back ways she’s never gone before -something she does every once in a while. But she never gets lost though, not really. Or maybe it’s because she always feels lost that she never really GETS lost, physically, at least. It’s completely dark by the time she makes it to the front door. The house is just as dark and uninviting as the air outside -probably why she’s just as ‘at home’ being outside than she is inside. She takes a moment to just listen, and she doesn’t hear anything but that doesn’t mean there’s no danger lurking there. She tries to prepare herself just in case. She opens the door, takes one step in and hears, “YOU!” from somewhere in the darkness.</p><p>Before she has time to mentally process the inexplicably angry tone of voice, before her body even receives the signal from her brain to recoil and cover her face, she feels it: the sharp pain of bony knuckles against her eye socket and the bone of her brow. She didn’t even see it coming.</p><p>The force of the blow knocks her back against the wall and her hands move to cover her face from whatever might come next -but nothing does, thankfully. “YOU did this to me.” Her mother slurs. Catra recognizes the faintly lit shape of the glass bottle in her hand as whiskey -she did always get just a bit angrier with whiskey. “Have a baby, they said. Everything will be better, they said. Fuck. You ruined my life!”</p><p>Catra didn’t cry at those words anymore. You can only hear something like that so many times before you get just jaded enough to not care. Or maybe it wasn’t that -maybe deep down she knew she hated herself more than her mother ever could, so the words just lost their sting. The latter was probably more tragic, so naturally that had to be true, right? Story of her life. She just waits there and lets her mother get it all out and walk away before she dares to get up. She walks right back out of the house to find a cozy park bench under the stars. Soon it would be too cold to do that, so she’d have to enjoy it while she could, right?</p><p>She walks first to the convenience store by her house and steals a quick snack. Well...dinner. Then she makes her way back across town. It would be easier for her to get to class by a reasonable time if she stayed the night back that way. It took about forty minutes to get there. It was fine until it started raining. Then she waited under the safety of a big-leafed tree. She was still wet, and still a little cold, but she was okay.</p><p>Who was she kidding? She was not okay. Catra felt like shit. She was definitely super hungry, she was kind of shivering, and she’d probably get stabbed or some shit if she stayed the night here. Looking across the field, she could see that she wasn’t the only person who was hiding from the rain under the big trees. She should probably think about finding a different park in a nicer neighborhood. How messed up was that? She started walking again, and every step she took seemed to make her feet ache. How far did she go today? At least like 10 miles.</p><p>Her mind started to wander and she thought about what it might be like if she got kidnapped off the side of this very road and taken halfway across the country -hell, across the world! How crazy would that be? She wouldn’t need a high school diploma, that’s for sure. But that was a bit...dramatic. She could just run away instead. Nobody would even know -nobody would miss her. Certainly not her mother, anyways. Her friends would be fine and she could have a new life of her own, a better one. She would be that person she saw in the mirror sometimes -fierce, unafraid.</p><p>It wasn’t until she no longer recognized where she was that she stopped and took notice of her surroundings. It had stopped raining. The wetness on her face was from her own tears. Jesus, Catra -you baby. Why am I crying? ‘Because you have nothing better to do’. Yeah, you’re right. So she cried and she walked just a bit faster to nowhere, still pretending it was the rain. Eventually she notices a car’s lights from behind her coming down the road. It sounds like it’s slowing down. Shit, I wasn’t really being serious about the kidnapping thing… Don’t be paranoid, it’s just a car. It’s gonna go right by. But she hears it slow down even more and her heart starts to pound. Catra quickly wipes her face with her wet sleeve, not wanting anyone to see her like this. When she puts pressure over her right eye, she winces and remembers that it must be getting puffy by now. Shit.</p><p> </p><p>“Catra?”</p><p>Are you fucking kidding me? She’s the LAST person I want to see me right now.<br/>
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….</p><p>It had been a very long day. Well...week. Month. Adora sighed, stepping out of her car. It had been a long four months. It all started with her mother’s diagnosis, and everything spiraled from there. She’d been diagnosed with ovarian cancer -late stages- that had now metastasized and spread to her liver and intestines. They gave her about 6 months to live. Adora was going to be 17 in just a few months, but her mother probably wouldn’t make it that long the way things were going, so they filed for emancipation to keep her out of the foster system. She had no relatives or godparents to speak of. Her mother hadn’t exactly had a large support system. So now she was officially on her own, renting a room from an old lady that lived near where she worked. She went to visit her mom almost every night, except for days like this when her mom just slept because of the drugs. Adora couldn’t bear to watch her just sleep like that. Some days she made herself do it anyways, because she wouldn’t be able to do that forever, wouldn’t be able to see her mother. She didn’t want to take the opportunity for granted, but tonight she just didn’t have the energy.</p><p>She was exhausted, and she’d have to be to work by 5:00am the next morning before school, yet here she was, unable to fall asleep. Why? She stared at the ceiling, begging her body to go to sleep, until finally her stomach grumbled and she got up to get something from the fridge. The empty fridge. Ahh, crap. That’s right. She was supposed to go get groceries after practice. The clock read 10:52pm. She should just go do it so that it’s done before tomorrow…</p><p>She sighed another deep sigh. There was only one store in town that was open 24 hours. Might as well just go do it if I’m not going to sleep. She put on some joggers and a zip-up hoodie. The store wasn’t busy -unsurprisingly. Somehow that made shopping less enjoyable than it already was. Adora would much rather watch people as they walk and talk throughout the store than just look at isles and isles of inanimate objects. She’d much rather talk to somebody, but all of her friends were normal. They got to sleep and have their parents cook and yeah, sure, maybe they hung out with her late at night sometimes or they’d stay up texting her -oh shit...did she pay her phone bill? Another sigh. I’ll do that tomorrow. Yeah...her friends didn’t have to do things like that. They never really understood what it was like for her to have to take care of herself -and oftentimes her mom -all the time.</p><p>Maybe it was the stress of the week, or maybe it was the late-night snack-attacks, but she splurged and bought some chips and a box of gushers -she hadn’t had those in a long time. Thankfully, she still had essentials at home like rice and bread and some frozen stuff, so this trip wasn’t as expensive as it could have been. She loads up the groceries in the trunk and the back seat and heads back home.</p><p>She really doesn’t mind driving this late at night when the roads are still. This time of year there’s a mist all night long through early morning and in the street lights it can look kind of eerie -especially when there’s people walking...at 11:30...on the side of the road. She thinks it’s probably some homeless person, but as she gets closer, she recognizes the form as female. Closer still and she just recognizes the person, period. Is that...is that Catra? Adora starts to slow down. It is. It’s totally Catra. She pulls her car slightly further to the side of the road and rolls down her window. She’s not sure why, but she feels excited -probably just to see a familiar face at this time of night, as odd as that sounds.</p><p>“Catra?”</p><p>The girl’s step stutters but she keeps walking, pretending not to hear her. Adora can’t see any headphones. What the hell is she doing out here? She gets a sneaking suspicion that she was probably right that Catra didn’t have a great home life. “Catra, hey!”</p><p>Catra doesn’t look back at her. “Buzz off, Adora.”</p><p>Guh. That’s right. She hates me. “Do you need a ride?” I wonder if she’s in trouble…She gets no answer. Adora can tell she’s been out in the rain. Her jacket looks soaked. “I can take you wherever.”</p><p>“Or, you could take yourself as far away from me as possible.”</p><p>“I’m just trying to be nice.” Catra continues to walk away from her. “Look...it’s probably going to rain again. Why don’t you just get in? I don’t bite.” Still nothing. She’s definitely running away. “Come on, where can I take you?”</p><p>Catra stops walking and Adora puts on the brakes. An almost imperceptible “Anywhere but here…” drifts through the mist to her ears and Adora’s gut twists again -this time with sadness. There was pain in her voice. There was pain and a loneliness that Adora recognized all too well.</p><p>“Get in.”</p><p>She waits and watches Catra process. Then she walks cautiously around the front of Adora’s car, still keeping her face turned away and her head down, and slides into the passenger seat. She immediately crosses her arms over her chest and turns her face to the window. Adora can’t help but feel like she’s been crying.</p><p>“So…” She starts to ask where Catra wants to go, but stops because she knows Catra will respond with something like ‘how the fuck should I know?’</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“No?”</p><p>“We’re not doing this.”</p><p>Adora starts to drive, confused. “Doing...what?”</p><p>“Talking.”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh okay. Then how about some music?” She turns on the radio to her favorite station. Blink 182 is playing and she sings along. She looks over at Catra periodically and is pleasantly surprised to see her almost smiling. It looks like she’s holding it back.</p><p>“Didn’t think you liked this kind of music.”</p><p>Adora shrugs. “I like all kinds of music, but this is just good for de-stressing.”</p><p>Catra goes silent again, mouthing the words from her side of the car. When they pull up to her house, Catra sort of sits up. “Where are we?”</p><p>“My place. I hope you don’t mind, but I really need to put these groceries away, but then I can actually take you wherever you want to go.” She motions to the food in the back seat and Catra nods. Adora thinks she’s never really seen Catra so quiet. She’s never exactly loud either -a woman of very few, very snappy, words. But this quiet isn’t marked by contempt. This quiet is...softer and takes up less space. That’s it. That’s what it is. It feels like Catra is trying to take up less space. She seems...vulnerable.</p><p>Adora stacks the bags on her arms to make just one trip, but then she fumbles with her keys and drops them on the back porch. Catra leans down to pick them up. “Thanks.” She stares at the lanyard of many keys and key chains. “It’s the green one.” Adora watches Catra’s hands sort through to grab the house key. She does have nice hands. That’s an odd thing to think about a person, isn’t it? The door opens and Adora turns on the light, slightly embarrassed. She’s never really had anyone over here before...it was really small and not well decorated. There were still a few boxes around the room.</p><p>She makes her way to the kitchen counter to dump the groceries and is about to apologize for the mess when she looks at Catra’s face for the first time tonight and freezes, the words catching in her throat. She was looking around the room and not bothering to hide anymore, her right eye swollen halfway shut and starting to bruise. The sudden pause seems to have caught her attention and they make eye contact. Adora had been right -she HAD been crying. Adora is going to ask her...so many things. Is she okay? Who did that? Is she hurt anywhere else? What happened?</p><p>“Don’t.” Her voice lacks its usual bite and it comes out as a question instead, like she’s asking Adora for a favor.</p><p>“Catra, I-”</p><p>She repeats it, slightly desperate -delicate, even. Almost like she wouldn’t be able to handle answering Adora’s questions. “Don’t.”</p><p>Adora swallows the questions down and pretends to carry on putting the groceries away like they’d had her attention the whole time. “I...was just going to say that I...I’m really hungry and I was going to ask, if it was okay with you if I made something to eat before we head out again.”</p><p>Catra nodded. “Sure.”<br/>
“Cool, thanks.”</p><p>And with that, she sets to work, cutting chicken and making rice. All the while, she feels Catra’s eyes watching her and she has to try not to watch her right back. “Why are you awake?”</p><p>The question surprises her. “Can’t sleep, I guess.”</p><p>“So you decided to go grocery shopping at midnight?”</p><p>She shrugs. “Yeah, I mean...I wasn’t going to have time to do it later this week and I needed food, and I was up...so…”</p><p>Adora chops the vegetables in silence before Catra feels like talking again. She figures this is the best way to make her feel comfortable -just let her talk when she wants to. She has to admit, it’s much better than Catra telling her to fuck off or calling her stupid or something. It’s actually kind of...nice. Just having another body here to talk to, or even just be near. “So...you live here...by yourself?”</p><p>Adora nods, grabbing a sauce from the fridge. “Yeah.”</p><p>“That’s sick.”</p><p>Adora forces a smile. “I guess.” Not really. “I rent from the older lady that lives in the main house, so she comes and we visit sometimes.”</p><p>“What about your parents?”</p><p>“My dad died when I was really young, so I don’t really remember him. My mom is…” Going to die very soon. “She’s in the hospital right now. The doctors didn’t give her very long.” A few moments pass. “I just got emancipated last week actually.”</p><p>“Shit, dude.”</p><p>“It’s okay.” That’s what she always said. That’s the only thing you really can say -otherwise people are really sad and quiet and awkward. Or they ask a lot of questions to try and diffuse their own awkwardness. Saying it was ‘okay’ was just the easiest way to get people to stop feeling sorry for her.</p><p>“Are you scared?”</p><p>Adora stops chopping and looks up at Catra across the counter. She wasn’t offended, just surprised. Nobody ever asked her things like THAT before -something so direct. People always tried to change the subject to something ‘happier’ or they start talking about what they can do to help. Catra doesn’t shy away from her stare this time. She’s just waiting patiently for an answer. Adora didn’t know that she had one. She’d never really thought about it before. She didn’t give herself TIME to think about it.</p><p>“I don’t know.” Her own voice sounded flat -unsure. “Probably.”</p><p>“What’s that supposed to mean?”</p><p>“I guess I don’t really think about it that much...I just…” She returns to chopping almost to prove her point. “...I just do whatever it is that I do, you know? I stay busy and don’t really think about it -just go through the motions, I guess.” She can feel Catra’s eyes on her, but they aren’t heavy with pity like most people. It’s something else there prickling at Adora’s skin. “I think if I were to stop and really think about how I’d feel it would be...I don’t know…”</p><p>“I know how that is.”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>Catra nods, staring at her hands on the counter. “Lonely.” The word reverberates around in her head for what seems like forever. How did she know? Adora watches Catra’s facial features change. It looks like the word that came out of her own mouth surprised her and her eyes -well...eye -widens a bit.</p><p>Adora nods. “Yeah.” The silence that follows isn’t uncomfortable in the slightest. It feels natural and not empty at all. It’s actually somewhat pleasant. Adora finishes cooking the food and serves up two places. “Here.” Catra stares at it. She looks like she’s about to reject it. “I made too much and I don’t want it to go bad. Eat it, please? Then we can head out to wherever.”</p><p>I want her to stay. The little voice comes from nowhere -somewhere deep inside her brain. The loneliest part was exhilarated to have somebody actually in her house. It was clear Catra was getting away from a bad situation and Adora had a safe space for her to be in. Plus, they both had school tomorrow. It just made sense if she stayed here. Maybe I can convince her...</p><p>She hands Catra a fork and she takes it somewhat sheepishly. Adora steals glances at her from the side. She was...different like this. Adora kind of figured that she had a front up at school, but this was like...way different. Catra really was pretty...sitting this close, Adora could see the coppery-tint to her dark hair in certain lights, and she could see the freckles on her nose, the smooth olive complexion of her skin. Her skin with goosebumps. Is she cold? That’s right, she was in the rain.</p><p>Adora gets up and goes to her dresser to grab some spare clothes. Catra doesn’t seem to notice she’s gone -she’s very absorbed in her food. She comes back and puts the clothes on the counter next to her. Catra glances up at her and again looks like she’s going to reject the offer. “Just something dry. You’ll want to be in dry clothes, wherever you go.” Stay. Again, the voice catches her off guard. Has she been so starved for human interaction? Even with Glimmer and Bow and the rest of her friends at school?</p><p>Catra takes them and stands. Adora watches as she starts to lift up the soaked top she has to peel it off. Once she realizes what Catra’s doing, she turns away. “I didn’t...sorry…”</p><p>Catra scoffs. “Nothing you haven’t seen before, Princess.” There it is. That tone returns to her voice to give her that edge -whatever it is that’s just so...Catra. Adora had no idea she liked it. Well...that’s not true. She just didn’t know WHY she liked it.</p><p>“Right, I was just trying to, you know, be respectful.”</p><p>She can hear Catra return to her seat and keep eating. “My, how gentlemanly of you.” Adora can practically hear the smirk on her face and it makes her want to laugh out loud. Something about Catra’s voice made her so...giddy. And shy. And embarrassed. And...turned her into a great oaf of a human being. It was ridiculous. “Thanks for the food. It’s really good.”</p><p>Adora turned back around and blushed. The shirt she gave Catra was way too big on her -she looked really cute. Am I...do I LIKE her? Like...LIKE her, like her? The thought was new and wholly unsettling. They always butt heads before and she was so mean and her attitude was obnoxious...but now she was here and it was like THIS and she was being so...so...comforting. Being around her right now is so easy. It’s normal. “Thanks.”</p><p>“I didn’t know you could cook, but I should’ve guessed.” Adora continued to eat her own plate, not particularly impressed with how this came out. “Honestly, is there anything you CAN’T do?”</p><p>Adora blushes again. “I mean...I can’t hold my breath for a very long time. I can’t do a superman pushup. I REALLY can’t dance.”</p><p>Catra rolls her eyes. “Yeah, because all of those are SOOO important and reflect terribly on your character. What the hell is a superman pushup anyways?”</p><p>Adora jumps down to the floor to show her. She gets about halfway down -which is progress -and falls. Catra laughs and the sound makes Adora feel like she’s floating. Holy shit. She has such a nice laugh. “That’s the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen. WHY would you want to do that?” To make you laugh like that. She doesn’t say the words, but man...Oh no. I think I like her. “You really are a meat-head, aren’t you?”</p><p>Adora climbs back up to her chair to finish her food. “If you say so.”</p><p>“I do.”</p><p>She notices that Catra has finished her food and is just watching her. She’s not trying to leave or put pressure on Adora to finish her food. Does that mean we’re cool? She decides to test the waters a little bit. “Hey, sorry. I’ll finish my food and then I can take you...wherever.”</p><p>Catra shrugs. “No pressure. I don’t have any plans.” Her heart skips a beat. Stay?</p><p>“Like...you have no timeline in mind? Or…” She’s trying to figure out how to word this delicately. “Or like you don’t have anywhere in mind to go?”</p><p>Catra’s face sort of falls and Adora feels like she’s overstepped. “Does it really matter?”</p><p>“Well...no. I mean, I guess kind of.” She feels like she’s holding her breath. “If you don’t really have anywhere to go, you could just...stay here tonight.” With me. Catra doesn’t react. “I don’t have a couch or anything but my bed is pretty big.” The words are out before she’s even given any thought to it, and then it’s too late to take them back and she’s just waiting in agony to know what Catra thinks of the idea -of her. “Or, I mean, I could take the floor. Like...a sleepover.” Stupid. You don’t have to say that. She knows what a sleepover is. Who am I kidding? She’s gonna think I’m a freak, inviting practically a stranger over for a sleepover.</p><p>“Sure.” Adora’s thoughts cease and she just stares back at her. Sure? Really? She wanted to stay. “I don’t have anywhere better to be.” Catra shrugs.</p><p>Adora can’t fight the smile breaking through. “Oh, yeah. O-okay, sure. Cool.”</p><p>Catra raises an eyebrow. “You’re kind of awkward, you know that? And here I thought you were one of the cool kids.”</p><p>Adora nods, still fighting the smile and biting her lip. “So...what I’m hearing is...you thought I was cool?”</p><p>“Tsh. You wish.” Catra rolls her eyes again and Adora thinks she’s even starting to like the way Catra does that. But her attention falls to the swollen and bruised eye.</p><p>“Hey...before you go to bed, you should put something cold on that…” Catra’s expression falls again, almost like she forgot about it too. Adora goes to the freezer and grabs a bag of frozen peas, breaking it up before bringing it to Catra. “You should probably lay down…” Catra follows her to the bed and sits on the edge carefully, like she’s testing it out. Adora hands her a towel to put under it and then the ice. Catra inhales with a hiss.</p><p>“Fuck…”</p><p>“I’m sorry...this will help.”</p><p>She’s pleasantly surprised that Catra isn’t fighting her about being cared for -she hadn’t expected her to be so easy going...and vulnerable. Adora grabs some ibuprofen from the cabinet and brings her a glass of water. “Here. These too.”</p><p>She sits up just enough to swallow them. As she’s laying back down, she speaks so quietly that Adora’s brain doesn’t understand the words at first. They take a moment to seep in. “My mom…”</p><p>Adora doesn’t know what to say, other than, “Shit…”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>She doesn’t say sorry, because Adora knows she hates it when people say it to her. It’s nobody’s fault -it’s just a bad situation and that sucks. That seems like the right move. Catra seems content with that. She just waits to see if Catra wants to tell her anything else -she clearly doesn’t.</p><p>“Hey, I kind of want dessert. Would you eat ice cream?”</p><p>“Hell yeah.”</p><p>Adora smiles all the way to the freezer. On her way, she glances at the clock. 1:47am. Any other night, she would be alone with her swirling thoughts, staring up at a dark ceiling in a lifeless room. Tonight, she has company -good company. She gets the ice cream and they talk. They talk about school and their friends and even about their home lives a little bit. Catra was pretty vague still, but the fact that she was actually opening up was a good sign. And it was easy -so easy. Conversation ebbed and flowed effortlessly from this to that, and when there was silence, it was never bad. They laughed more -Adora REALLY liked Catra’s laugh -and at one point they cried a little bit. Adora hadn’t cried in so long. She really had been bottling everything up and just distracting herself -and Catra let her cry. Didn’t try to change the subject, didn’t shush her, didn’t tell her it would be okay. Catra just let her be, let her feel, uninterrupted.</p><p>When the ice cream was gone and the clock read 3:32am, Catra had fallen asleep. Head gently turned to the side and one leg out to the side, she looked peaceful. She was...beautiful. Adora chastised herself for being creepy and watching her...new friend? Her classmate? Watching Catra sleep. She gets up and turns out the light and prepares to stare at the ceiling for the next two hours before her alarm goes off. But between the warmth of the body next to hers and the soft, rhythmic sound of Catra’s breathing, Adora was unconscious not thirty seconds after her head hit the pillow, and she got the most blissful two hours of sleep she’d ever had in her life.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. The Comfort of A Stranger's Bed</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Catra wakes up in an unfamiliar place...and she likes it? </p><p>Or...</p><p>Catra takes care of sick Adora to the best of her abilities.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Catra doesn’t panic when she awakes in an unfamiliar place. That’s super weird right? She should totally be panicking. She doesn’t recognize this cramped and partially filled room that looks like somebody tried to make a studio apartment out of a hundred-year-old cabin. She doesn’t recognize the scent of the clothes she’s in or the air or the covers she’s wrapped in. And at first, she doesn’t recognize the arms and legs wrapped around her, clinging to her from behind. So why? Why did she feel like she could stay here forever? Why does she LIKE it?</p><p>Then it occurs to her -oh shit...I stayed at Adora’s place. NOW the panic sets in. Her first ever sleepover was with one of the most popular preps in her school -the High School Sweetheart that everyone loved. Adora picked her up off the side of the road, crying through her black eye, drenched and cold. Adora fed her and took care of her and offered her a place to stay. Adora talked with her -really talked with her- and made her feel halfway normal and got her to laugh and put a smile on her face. Adora is literally wrapped around her right now, fast asleep while her alarm blares in Catra’s ear.</p><p>Jesus, she’s hot -literally. Catra is dripping sweat. Is she really sleeping through this shit? The alarm is like the dive warning of a submarine and it does in fact make Catra feel like her head is a metal cage, sinking in cold water. She turns her head and tries to catch a glimpse of the blonde, but she’s nuzzled too close in Catra’s hair to see. But she’s kind of...whimpering? And...is she shivering? Is she cold? How could she POSSIBLY be cold and feel this hot at the same time?Catra reaches a hand behind her to poke Adora awake so she can turn off this goddamn sound. Who sets an alarm for 5 am anyways? Somebody that gets up super early to work…</p><p>When her hand makes contact, she leaves it there. Christ, she was like...REALLY hot. Is she sick? Does she have a fever? Catra pulls away and tries to get out of Adora’s iron grip. It takes two tries before she’s free and she can turn Adora’s alarm off. Adora immediately clings to her again, mumbling incoherently. Facing this way, Catra is able to see her face and she has only two thoughts. One: that Adora is definitely fevered. Her face is flushed and she’s got perspiration misting her hairline and forehead. It makes sense, when she thinks about the fact that Adora apparently never sleeps and she’s over-worked all the time. Two: Adora Grayskull has to be the most attractive human being on this planet to be sleep deprived, sick, and sweaty, and still fucking look like THAT. Are you shitting me?</p><p>Goddammit. How did this happen? Overnight, she’s gone from wanting to avoid Adora’s stupid, obnoxious, peppy face at all costs, to being utterly infatuated with her, apparently. Fuck. She’s super pretty. The sunny demeanor and sickly sweet kindness she threw at people like candy wasn’t a front -it was real. You can’t NOT like that. Plus, she’s driven, and she’s on her own, and she still handles her shit. God, she really is perfect.</p><p>She’s not sure what comes over her, what force of nature possesses her hand to move of its own accord, but Catra reaches up and brushes back some stray hairs with tentative fingers. Her ponytail is now loose and, not wild...but relaxed. Adora’s eyes stay closed and she mumbles again. After everything she heard last night -about Adora’s mom and just their situation -she realizes that it’s been a hellish year for Adora. She has been trying to support herself and be there for her mom and go to school and get into college, and still be good at her sports, and go to work, and, and, and.</p><p>Well, she sure as shit can’t go to work like this. What was the name of her work again? Something Rebel? Morning Rebel? Yeah, that’s it. Catra opens Adora’s phone -because, of course she doesn’t have a lock. She looks up the number and calls. For a split second, between the first ring and the answering machine, Catra wonders why exactly she’s doing this. The voice on the machine is Adora’s, bright and shiny and awake -quite jarring at 5:10 am if you ask Cata. “Thanks for calling us at the Morning Rebel. We’re sorry we couldn’t get to phone quick enough. Please leave your name and number and we’ll get back to you as soon as we can. If you have a question about our menu options or hours, feel free to visit our website at MorningRebelCoffee.com” Beep.</p><p>Catra takes a breath -”Uhh...hi. I’m calling for Adora? Grayskull. She’s super sick and she won’t be at work this morning...so...you’ll have to find somebody else to do it.” She tries to think of anything else that she might need to say. She hangs up and turns all of the rest of Adora’s alarms off. The girl needs sleep more than anything right now. Well...and probably food right? Ah, man. Catra can’t cook for shit. What else do sick people need? She googles it using Adora’s phone. Water -proper hydration is imperative to blah blah blah….Protein, blah blah blah. She scrolls. Rest and medicine. Tylenol or ibuprofen. Uhh...I bet Adora has that.</p><p>She puts the phone down. Okay. She can do this. She’s taken care of herself while sick tons of times -but...well...okay...so ‘taken care of’ is a loose turn of phrase. She really just existed in misery until her body got over it. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, right? But something tells her that Adora can’t afford to wait and see if this kills her -she’s too perpetually busy for that. Plus, Catra wants her to feel...not like this at all. And not alone. But one thing is for certain: if she’s going to take care of anyone, she needs a little more beauty rest herself.</p><p>She sleeps blissfully for some odd number of hours and then is rudely awakened again by Adora’s phone. Half asleep, she picks up. Only when she hears the other person speak does she realize what a terrible fucking mistake that is. “Adora? Where are you? You were on the schedule to open today but when I got here it was all closed up.” Catra wants to say fuck off. She wants to hang up. But she doesn’t want Adora to get in trouble. Her throat feels dry as she starts to speak into the receiver.</p><p>“She’s sick.”</p><p>“Oh! Oh my gosh! Adora, is that you? No kidding, your voice sounds so….does your throat hurt?” Hey, fuck you! That’s just my voice.</p><p>“Adora’s asleep.”</p><p>“Oh...well...then who am I speaking to?” Ohhhhhh shit. People can’t know she was here but she also can’t just hang up now after saying two words and clearly identifying herself as not Adora. People would think Adora was being held hostage or something.</p><p>“Uh...Catra.”</p><p>“Catra? Are you a friend of Adora’s mom?” Good, she doesn’t know my name.</p><p>“Sure.”</p><p>“Oh...OHHHHHH CATRA!” Ah, damn. “Wait...what are you doing at Adora’s place at seven in the morning? I mean...Nevermind. Well tell Adora I hope she feels better soon! I wish she’d have just texted me. I could have covered for her.”</p><p>“Sure. Bye.”</p><p>Catra sighs. A pit forms in her stomach. Somebody knows she’s here with Adora. Somebody from school. They would probably start spreading rumors. About what? Does it really matter? Wasn’t she just revelling in peoples’ attention the other day? Yes, but this is different. This would be horribly embarrassing because Adora would have to go around and shut them down -no, she doesn’t really hang out with Catra. No, they aren’t friends, or anything more -definitely not more. Then again, Adora is too nice to reject her passively like that. Or...maybe she’s not. Maybe she can’t stand confrontation and she’d rather let people think what they want, including her. Did she even like girls? Catra thinks back to what she heard in the bathroom the other day. She feels a small twinge of hope in her chest that it might actually be true.</p><p>Catra stretches and starts to move away from Adora’s burning figure, still somehow fast asleep despite all the noise and motion. She doesn’t really know what exactly she’s going to do, or why, but she knows that something inside of her wants to do something nice for the blonde. She takes a deep breath and pushes her insecurities aside and sets to work. This would be the first day she’d ever skipped out on class and actually done something productive with her time rather than sulk and wander around. It felt...kind of good? She wouldn’t go so far as to say she likes it, per say. In fact, she feels particularly useless and the experience overall makes her question how she’s managed to survive this long, considering she is definitely not a self-sufficient human. But when she thinks about the fact that Adora will wake up, probably feeling like shit, and have at least SOMETHING to eat, she feels pretty good about it. Never mind the flour on the floor and counter, or the several bowls of failed experiments that she couldn’t bear to throw in the pan after tasting the batter. She did something nice for somebody, and she actually enjoyed it.</p><p>She even sets the table -a totally foreign concept. But hey, if you’re going to give somebody a meal, even a meal made from their own ingredients, and even if you destroy their kitchen in the process, you’ve got to at least make it pretty. Napkin? No napkin? Does she even have a napkin? I see paper towels. Does that count? She decides against it. Why the fuck am I so nervous? Suddenly, looking at her sad display, she feels self-conscious. She’s never made somebody a meal before. Does Adora even like pancakes? I shouldn’t have done this. I can probably throw it all out before she wakes up.</p><p>Just as she’s reaching for one of the bowls of failed experimentation, she hears a soft, hoarse croak from across the room. “M-mom?”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Being Cared For</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Adora lets Catra take care of her for a day.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>SO CUTE.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She has been having the most wonderful dream. Strange, but wonderful. Her mother returned from the hospital, stronger and healthier than ever. Her hair has magically grown back in, full and coppery-brown with its sunstreaks from summer beach trips. And her laugh -it brought Adora to tears. It had been so long since she’d heard her mother’s laugh. Then she’s being pulled away and her body starts to feel things, things that aren’t there. She realizes that it’s a dream and tries to stay -just a bit longer -but her body wakes despite her best efforts and she opens her eyes to her apartment, seemingly very cold but...not empty like she expects. Her vision is bleary but she can see...somebody else. Brown hair. Was she really still dreaming? “M-mom?”</p><p>“No uh…” That didn’t sound like her mother. “it’s-it’s me...it’s Catra.”</p><p>Sure enough, that voice is definitely her classmate’s. As Adora’s eyes adjust, the figure across the room morphs and becomes the girl she maybe, sort-of, might have a crush on. “Catra? You stayed?” Bits and pieces of the night before come back to her. Groceries. Black eye. Food. Crying over ice cream. Then it strikes her that her alarm never went off and her heart rate skyrockets. There is light streaming through the windows. It should still be super dark. “SHIT!” She throws the covers off and swings her legs over the edge of the bed, only to realize that her whole body feels like its been mowed down by a truck. Her knees buckle under her weight and she pauses long enough to notice how cold her bones are without that blanket over her. Everything aches and her head is pounding.</p><p>“Whoa, whoa! Easy sleeping beauty, you’re hella sick.”</p><p> </p><p>Sick? She couldn’t be sick! She had to go to work! “What time is it?” Agh. Her head…</p><p>“It’s like...nine?”</p><p>She snaps her eyes off the floor. No way. “NINE?! We’re late for class! We’ve gotta-” She stands up again and her chest complains with a deep ache as a chill runs down her spine. Shit. I’m totally sick.</p><p>“You gotta do jack shit, princess.” She rubs her eyes, feeling like she’s about to cry. This would be the first day this year that she’d missed. She’s been pushing so hard, every day, so that she doesn’t fall behind. She can’t fall behind now. The last few games of the season are coming up and she needs to be totally focused. Goddammit. She slept through her whole work shift? Shit...She didn’t even email her teachers beforehand. She was going to get in so much trouble…”You can eat these pancakes though.”</p><p>Adora really looks at Catra now, taking in her surroundings and fighting the urge to cry. The brunette seems to have armoured herself behind a wall of smugness again, but no amount of wit could hide that shiner. It looks pretty bad this morning -probably hurts too. She still looks really cute in my shirt -one shoulder threatens to fall off and expose more olive-complexioned skin.</p><p>And then Adora takes in the general state of the kitchen. It looks like Catra was making some sort of culinary masterpiece -there were bowls and utensils everywhere. Adora follows Catra’s mismatched eyes toward her little table, which was set for two. There was a small stack of pancakes and what looked like a...block of...eggs? Scrambled eggs, yes.</p><p>Adora is overwhelmed to say the least. She’s exhausted. She feels like her whole body is in a state of revolt that she’s even alive. She’s super stressed that she’s late for school and slightly worried that she might get fired for a no-call, no-show at work, which she’s never done. But...Catra STAYED last night. And now she’s here and...she made Adora breakfast. She’s clearly put effort into this -she almost looks kind of shy now. “I’m no five star chef. It’s not much…but I think you kinda need it.”</p><p>She’s right. As much as Adora tells herself that she’s been fine on her own. She’s just...so, so tired. Nobody has made Adora a meal in...months, save for the few times she’s made time to go hang with Glimmer and Bow and their parents make them things. But nobody had made her a meal in this house -room.</p><p>Now she really feels like she could cry. She clears her throat. “Catra, thank you. This is...really nice.”</p><p>“Well obviously SOMEBODY has to take care of you since you won’t do it yourself.” Her shyness has passed like a shooting star and now Catra is back to being herself, but still different. More like how she was last night compared to how she is at school. Adora likes it. This version of Catra feels...comforting, and she’s way more relaxed.</p><p>But wait. Catra wanted to take care of her? Why? Did it really matter? The gesture was appreciated all the same. Adora pulls herself up and makes her way to the table, desperately trying not to use her hands to pick up her legs and move them -she wills her legs to do the work and carry her body under Catra’s watchful eye. “And here I thought you didn’t like me.”</p><p>Catra points a battered spoon at her. “Hey, this is not because I like you.” Adora’s heart sank a little, even though her brain registered the playful tone relaying the words. “This is for picking me up and feeding me last night.”</p><p>The blonde plops down in the chair in front of her. “Oh well, don’t worry about that. You helped me out too, so…”</p><p>“I couldn’t find the syrup, but if you tell me where it is, I’ll grab it for you.”</p><p>“Uh, I don’t think I have any? I usually use peanut butter or jam.”</p><p>Catra made a face. “Ew. Okay. Where are those?”</p><p>“In the pantry.” She watches Catra stand on her tippy-toes to reach the peanut butter and stifles a laugh. She seems so intimidating at school in her leather and ripped jeans, but she’s really kind of cute...stop staring. Adora scolds herself and gets up to grab her phone from the counter. That’s odd, she definitely had it in bed. Catra must have used it. The text messages have been flooding in since this morning -her stomach twists.</p><p>Flower Power: Why was Catra at your…</p><p>Sorry you’re sick! Next time just...</p><p>BF Squad: PERFUMA SAID CATRA IS AT YO…</p><p>WHY?!</p><p>Also, like sorry you’re sick.</p><p>BUT WHY IS SHE THERE WITH….</p><p>2 missed calls from Glimmer</p><p> </p><p>Adora groans, dreading actually going through and reading them all -eighteen messages in total. How did they know she was sick? How did they know Catra was with her? Catra sets peanut butter and jam down on the table in front of her. “What’s wrong?”</p><p>“Oh uh…” Would Catra mind? What if she didn’t want to be associated with Adora at school? She’s avoided her up until now. She should probably know…”I guess my friends know you’re here somehow? I’m sorry, I don’t know how that happened.”</p><p>She can’t get a read on the face Catra makes, but she’s fairly sure it’s not great. “That was my fault. I guess somebody you work with tried to call you this morning. I told her you were sick and she asked who I was -I should have lied and said I kidnapped you or something.” Well...that answers that question.</p><p>“That was Perfuma then. That totally makes sense. Thanks for doing that.” Catra just stares at her for a moment, arms folded over each other on the table, looking thoughtful. “For telling her I was sick, I mean.”</p><p>Catra shrugged. “No problem.”</p><p>“Sorry about my friends. They can be kind of gossipy sometimes.” Catra is clicking her black nails against the table softly and it’s wholly distracting.</p><p>“S’okay. You think I give a shit what they think?” Adora recoils internally. She can tell Catra doesn’t necessarily mean to be harsh, but it definitely feels like they’re sliding backwards here.</p><p>“No, I just…” Adora’s fumbling for the right thing to say -the right way to phrase it to get what she wants. “I know that rumors can be really annoying and people might think, you know, that we’re friends or something. So...if you want me to, I dunno, make something up, I can.”</p><p>Catra sighs. “Do whatever you want, princess. Just eat those freaking pancakes before they get cold.” That definitely isn’t what she wanted to hear.</p><p>She makes due with small talk again as she fixes up the luke-warm pancakes on her plate. To be honest, she’s really not hungry and nothing tastes good, but she eats it all anyways and she meant it when she said thank you. Catra drinks a glass of milk with hers, making faces while she chews on them. “Alright, Grayskull. The peanut butter one isn’t bad.” Adora smiles triumphantly and Catra shakes her head. “Hey, don’t get cocky. I said they weren’t BAD. I never said it was good.”</p><p>“Well, I didn’t actually make the pancakes. YOU did.”</p><p>Catra chuckles and it seems to warm her from the inside out. “Touche.” She takes another bite and washes it down with more milk. This is so weird….Adora could sit and watch her eat all day. Creepy right? Totally creepy. But true. Stop staring, again. She turns to her phone.</p><p>“I didn’t even email my teachers.”</p><p>“So? I do that all the time.”</p><p>“Well sure...but...I mean...do you...aren’t you?…”</p><p>Catra rolls her eyes. “A drop-out?” They look at each other and Adora feels guilty for not immediately correcting her. “No. I think I’ve got like a B-minus in bio, a B in algebra II and a B in Lit.”</p><p>“WHAT?”</p><p>The brunette cocked an eyebrow. “I’m truant, not stupid.”</p><p>Adora was floored. “W-I never thought you were stupid-”</p><p>“I’m smart enough to know half the assignments we get are bullshit busywork and I’m just not here for it.” Adora just stared at her and Catra stared back with those gorgeous eyes. She would give anything to know what Catra was thinking right now. “Besides, aren’t you emancipated? Can’t you just call the school whenever you want and be like, ‘yo, I’m not coming today cause’ I say so.’”</p><p>Adora felt like, given the conversations they had last night, the comment was insensitive, but she couldn’t expect Catra to understand that. Catra’s situation was totally the opposite of hers. Catra would do anything to get out from under her mom, and Adora certainly didn’t blame her for that. So of course, the idea of answering to just herself was probably appealing. Still, it stung a little. “I mean, I guess. But I’m not...I’m not good with math, and I know that if I miss a day or two I’ll be really behind.”</p><p>“Just give yourself today to let your body catch up. Math is easy -it’s just critical thinking.”</p><p>Adora laughs nervously, embarrassed. “Yeah, well...apparently I’m not so good at that.”</p><p>Catra smirks and Adora’s heat gives a little flutter. “If you feel like you’ve fallen behind, you can just ask me for help. Math is kinda my thing.”</p><p>Adora looks a bit too intently at her classmate’s mouth, remembering just how soft her lips felt at that party. “Ask you for help?” She feels her cheeks start to burn and she hopes Catra doesn’t notice.</p><p>“M-hmm.” Catra licks peanut butter off the side of her finger and it DOES THINGS inside Adora’s body. What the hell was that?! Did she do that on purpose? Is she teasing me? “We’ll call it a favor.” Then she leans forward on her arms and her eyes are positively gleaming. “You’ll owe me one.”</p><p>“A favor?” Catra nods. “What would you want?”</p><p>She scowls. “How should I know? I don’t need anything yet.” The brunette holds out her hand to shake. “Deal?”</p><p>Adora thinks about it. She’s not sure what exactly she’s getting herself into -the knowing and all-mischievous smile tugging the corners of Catra’s mouth tell her that she’s playing with fire. She takes Catra’s hand and shakes it, but doesn’t immediately let go. Instead she stares at the connection where it seems like all the heat in the room is coming from. Is it just her, or do their hands fit perfectly together? She tears her gaze away to look at Catra once more and Catra seems to be sizing her up almost.</p><p>They let go slowly. “It’s a deal then.”</p><p>“Yeah, deal.”</p><p>They clean the kitchen together in a very comfortable near-silence, simply appreciating that the other is there.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Pining While You Sing to Me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>More of Catra hanging out with Adora while she's sick.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sorry my posts have been few and far between for a while. I promise I WILL continue writing them though -even if it's slow-going :) These idiots deserve it. #Catradora4ever</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Adora is such a dork, it’s unreal. She sort of talks to herself sometimes -which, okay, shouldn’t come as a total surprise given how frequently she’s really alone in this little room -and she’s so incredibly expressive. Even when she’s not doing anything with the rest of her face, her eyes could tell stories, complete with a beginning, middle, and end. Catra didn’t even know eyes could be that way. It was kind of amazing really -definitely central to Adora’s genuine, goofy, charm. </p><p>After they clean the kitchen, Adora falls fast asleep again wrapped -more like tangled -in her blankets. Catra sits on the couch and watches the pile of fabric rise and fall softly as the blonde breathes deeply underneath. Adora must really be exhausted. She didn’t sleep that much...come to think of it, neither did I. Her own eyes start to get heavy and she doesn’t fight the sleepiness that overtakes her consciousness. </p><p>Catra finds herself floating around a dark room, completely weightless. Suddenly, a door appears and she opens it. The lights are so bright on the other side that she can’t see anything at first, but as she steps through the door frame and feels the cold tile floor on her feet, the lights dim and she recognizes the marble hallway as Glimmer Brightmoon’s palace house. Only, this time, it’s empty, and feels...lifeless, almost. </p><p>She’s so out of place here...“Hello? Anybody home?” </p><p>No response. She walks somewhat cautiously to the den where there are two girls standing against the wall talking. They turn when she walks in, look her up and down, and snicker to each other. Catra swears she hears “freak” on their lips. She flips them off and they glare at her -she feels their tiny daggers in her back as she walks across the room. Why the fuck am I here anyways? I’ve only been here like once. She catches her reflection in the gloss of a picture frame as she walks by and feels a twinge of some heavy feeling. She looks dark -everything about her. Her hair, her skin, the black nail polish, her ripped jeans, the belt, the boots. Dark. She’s never really thought that was a bad thing before, never really cared what people thought, but maybe...maybe she really was a freak. </p><p>“Catra!” She hears a voice calling her name from outside. It’s Adora. The girls are gone and the living room is empty now -Catra leaves it and the doubting thoughts behind, significantly perked up by the way Adora said her name. “What are you waiting for? Come here!” I’m coming. She can’t fight the smile on her face. Adora sounds genuinely excited to se-who is that? </p><p>Catra see’s Adora in the pool, rocking her shorts and sports bra -that big smile plastered on her face, eyes glowing bluer than the water. But she’s not looking at Catra. She’s watching very intently as another girl walks towards her from across the patio, sleek auburn hair pulled back in an effortless ponytail, a cute little swimsuit. The girl turns and Catra nearly gasps. It’s...me. But...I’M me, so...who’s that? The girl from her mirror stares back -the girl she wants to be sometimes. Yes, that’s HER saunter. That’s HER smirk. But there’s something else about her that Catra doesn’t like, something that crawls under Catra’s skin and makes her itch. The brunette’s expression is almost menacing as she slips into the water, right into Adora’s arms. </p><p>She’s an imposter -a demon -in MY place. Catra immediately feels as if there could be steam coming from her ears. “Get away from her!” </p><p>They both turn and see her, and even Catra is surprised. She didn’t know she could interact with them. “Uhm…’m sorry...who are you?” Adora’s cheeks are red and she looks a bit uncomfortable. The words sting. </p><p>“It’s me, Catra.” </p><p>The girl from the mirror gives a throaty laugh. “Very funny, freak. Now get lost, we’re kind of busy here.” WIthout breaking eye contact, she bites her lip and smiles wickedly, grabbing Adora’s ponytail and pulling the blonde’s face into her neck. Adora lets out a small noise of surprise but then her eyes flutter closed and she inhales. It looks like she’s trying to decide whether or not it’s okay for her to kiss the skin there. Fucking bitch! She wants to make Catra watch this -which is really confusing for a lot of reasons. First, it’s...really hot. Second, it feels...wrong. All wrong! The fake her is clearly using Adora somehow, manipulating her. </p><p>Catra had to think of something to say.  “Adora, she’s just…using you!” </p><p>Then Adora is kissing the imposter’s neck hungrily, and her hands roam, and Catra feels sick with jealousy. Or maybe she’s just sick. The other girl’s face doesn’t change even as her hands continue to pull at Adora’s ponytail to keep her close, even as she’s moaning softly -it’s so fake. Catra is frightened but not surprised when her eyes start to glow an uncanny red. “It’s too late, Catra. She’s mine now.” </p><p>Sure enough, when Adora opens her eyes, they glow red too. “Why would I ever want you, when I could have somebody like her?” </p><p>Catra sucks in a sharp breath. And there it is -the truth laid out so nicely for her. So what if it came from a distorted dream version of Adora? She knows it’s the truth.Adora is gorgeous and popular and smart. “Catra.” Adora speaks so softly to the girl from the mirror. </p><p>“See? I’m just a better you. People like me.” </p><p>Adora takes her face in her hand, and -glowing eyes or not -Catra desperately wants it to be her. They kiss and Catra can feel her lips tingle remembering what that mouth feels like, but their kiss was soft and half-assed -not like what’s happening now at all. “Catra.” Adora says her name again. Goddammit. </p><p>“Catra?” She feels pressure on her arm, but there’s nobody else around. “Wake up, it’s okay.”<br/>Her eyes open to see Adora’s, no longer red but their usual vibrant blue. “Catra, you were having a bad dream.” Her eyebrows are furrowed and the concern there is genuine -so genuine. Catra wants to punch her in her stupid beautiful face but she knows it’s not fair. You can’t punish somebody for something they did in a dream, right? And you definitely can’t punish people for having standards...Catra just doesn’t measure up, it’s fine. </p><p>“What were you dreaming about?” </p><p>Catra groans. “Nothing.” </p><p>She can tell Adora doesn’t believe her but she doesn’t press. “I think I dreamt that I was in a baking competition with my old dog?” She plops down on the couch next to Catra, seemingly oblivious to Catra’s poor mood. “It was super weird. I think somebody tried to sabotage it with ghost pepper hot sauce though, and everyone who ate it actually blew fire.” </p><p>Catra tries to shake off the dream rejection and settle into whatever this almost-maybe-friendship is again. “I can’t tell if you seem like you’re feeling better or worse.” </p><p>Adora shrugs. “Me either, but I’m awake now at least.” She did look less like she was about to fall over, but her cheeks were still flushed -which wasn’t a bad thing by any means -and she still looked kind of...off. “I was kind of hoping we could...hang out?” </p><p>“Tsh. We have been hanging out, dingus.” </p><p>Adora rubs the back of her neck. “Well...we’ve been sleeping. Which, like, is great, but...I like when we’re both...you know...awake.” God, she’s cute. </p><p>“Wow, what a compliment. ‘I prefer your company when you’re conscious’. That’s probably the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.” </p><p>“I hope not.” </p><p>Catra smiles and Adora smiles back. “So if you don’t want to sleep, what do you wanna do? There’s only like one more thing I’m good at.” </p><p>“And what’s that?” </p><p>“Being an asshole.” </p><p>Adora nods slowly. “Well then I guess you’re going to have to learn a new trick.” She gets up and moves towards a small desk in the far corner of the room. Catra watches the way she moves, noting how different it is from when she’s at school or on the field -she’s definitely still tired. “Here.” She’s holding up a headphone set. “My mom and I used to do this thing whenever I had a rough day where we would put these on and absolutely blast the music and you sing a song to cheer yourself up.” </p><p>Catra searches her face for any hint of laughter but there is none. She’s serious? “That’s cute, but also legit the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard.” </p><p>“Don’t knock it till you try it.” </p><p>“How about YOU try it and I’ll just...keep knocking it?” </p><p>The blonde smiles again and Catra’s heart flutters. “C’mon Catra. Pleaaaaaase? It’s fun. It’s so good for you.”</p><p>“You’re right, it will definitely be good for me to watch you make a complete fool of yourself. I’ll feel so much better about myself.” </p><p>Adora rolls her eyes at that. “Fine. I’ll go first, but then you have to go.” She puts the headphones on and grabs her phone. A quirky expression crosses her face that Catra can’t quite pin. </p><p>“I make no promises.” </p><p>“This was like my favorite song ever as a kid, so...be nice.” Catra cocks an eyebrow and Adora just smiles back at her, biting her lip somewhat nervously. </p><p>Catra can hear when the music starts and Adora immediately bobs her head a little to a very 80-ish sounding beat. Then she starts to sort of wiggle her shoulders and it becomes apparent very soon that Adora Grayskull can’t dance -but she’s still hella cute. Her eyes are closed and her cheeks are pink -likely more from embarrassment now than the fever.</p><p>“I looked at you<br/>You stole my heart<br/>You were all that I anticipated” </p><p>Catra’s caught off guard by how hard Adora just goes for it.  She’s full-on singing, totally unable to hear herself through the music blaring in her ears. Her eyes are closed and she’s still kind of half-dancing -as well as you would expect a well-coordinated athlete to be able to move. At least she was moving well -just not on beat at all. </p><p>“I wanted you<br/>Every part<br/>But I knew that love would be complicated<br/>I began to touch<br/>But you wouldn't let it<br/>It never seemed to be the right time” </p><p>She doesn’t have a bad voice -she sounds like she’s probably hitting the right notes -she’s just a bit pitchy every now and then. Catra can’t help the grin plastered on her face. Adora looks like such a little kid -smiling and dancing without a care in the world, just jammin’. It was amazing really. She was amazing. Then she opens her eyes and she sings TO Catra, using her phone as a microphone. I wish. Her confidence doesn’t waver one bit. She’s still on that make-believe stage, doing her thing, snapping and moving semi-awkwardly.</p><p>“I started to give up<br/>Down to the limit<br/>And then you changed your mind, oh<br/>And we begin to rock -steady” </p><p>She starts moving her hips back and forth, and it’s by far the most coordinated motion Adora’s made so far, and definitely the most suggestive. Catra wonders for a brief moment if Adora really understands the message resulting from the lyrics and pelvic motion in her direction. Catra only admits to herself that she likes it a little bit. </p><p>“Steady rockin' all night long<br/>And we begin to rock steady<br/>Rockin' 'til the break of dawn<br/>Rock -steady<br/>Steady rockin' all night long”</p><p>Adora jumps into a split stance and points at Catra on beat. Again, singing to her, but also not. Catra can only hope she means it. </p><p>“You looked at me to my surprise<br/>You were through anticipating<br/>I should have known<br/>It was in your eyes<br/>That you were gettin' tired of waiting<br/>You wanted me so much<br/>But I didn't get it” </p><p>Only for a moment does Catra wonder if Adora really does know she’s interested. But then she continues to be lost in her own world and Catra knows by the complete innocence in her eyes that she has no clue what this song is even about. She really was like a little kid.</p><p>“How could a fellow be so blind?<br/>I started to give up<br/>But love wouldn't let it<br/>Then you walked into my life<br/>And we begin to rock steady” </p><p>She’s started to do that same motion with her hips again and this time, Catra gives her a teasing look. Oh yeah? She holds back a smirk, biting her tongue as she winks, calling Adora’s blough and setting her face and ears on fire. Cara can practically see the lightbulb go off -the little ‘oh shit’ moment. She nearly stops dancing altogether and sings with a bit less vigor. </p><p>“Steady rockin' all night long<br/>And we begin to rock steady<br/>Rockin' 'til the break of dawn” </p><p>She reaches up and pulls the headphones off somewhat quickly, still looking embarrassed. She clears her throat. “And...it pretty much ends after that. It’s just the same thing repeated.” <br/>Catra can’t stop the corner of her lip from curling anymore. “Mmm. Shame. I was kind of feeling your steady rock.” She mimicked Adora’s hip sway, sending another wave of color over her. <br/>“Shut up! I haven’t listened to that since I was like nine…” HA! I was right. She totally didn’t know it was about sex.</p><p>“Well, bravo, princess. You were right. That was so good for me. I’m pretty sure that shit could cure cancer.”  It takes entirely too long to process the expression that flashes across Adora’s face. Oh shit. But it’s too late to take the words back. Ohhhh my god. How could you be so stupid?! “Fuck, dude….” She covers her face with her hands. “FUCK. I’m sorry. That-” </p><p>“Don’t worry about it.” </p><p>“No, that was...so…” She exhales.</p><p>“Really, It’s fine, Catra. You didn’t mean anything by it.” </p><p>“...messed up.” </p><p>When she finally removes her hands from her face and looks at Adora again, she’s smiling and doesn’t look offended at all, which honestly almost makes her feel worse. “You wanna make it up to me?” </p><p>She doesn’t even have to think about it. “Yes, of course.” I’m such a dipshit. That goofy grin spreads further and Adora raises her eyebrows, making Catra suspicious. “What?” The blonde holds out the headphones. “No way dude!” </p><p>“Awh, come on, you owe meeeee.” </p><p>Catra rolls her eyes and snatches the headphones, groaning internally. This is what you get for being a dick Catra. Don’t make jokes about people’s dying mothers. Jesus. “Fine.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Sing To You</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Catra sings to Adora :) Iss nice</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I love them.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Catra has such a beautiful...everything. There’s a few moments of quiet while the song starts and Catra’s just sitting there with her eyes closed, looking focused. Adora tells herself it’s not creepy to stare -Catra’s performing and Adora is simply her audience. She SHOULD be the center of attention right now. Her eyes rake over the other girl. Has her skin always looked so soft? Adora’s eyes snap back to her mouth when she hears Catra take a breath. </p><p>I breathe you in without fail</p><p> </p><p>And damn, she can sing! Adora’s mouth hangs open at the first note -soft and muddled with a rasp that finds its way down the blonde’s back, disrupting whatever butterflies had apparently been just hanging out in her stomach and waiting for such an opportunity to make their presence known.</p><p> </p><p>And then I think twice before I exhale, </p><p>But you're not mine to keep</p><p>You tell me you wanna be free</p><p>Yeah, you wanna keep it nice</p><p>You wanna keep it low-key</p><p> </p><p>Oh, there is nothing ‘low key’ about this crush anymore. Adora was infatuated -HARD. She could listen to Catra sing all day and not get bored. She could sing anything -the dictionary! It would be magic. That control... </p><p> </p><p>Oh, but don't bring me down</p><p>Just try to understand me</p><p>Won't you come a little closer</p><p>And let me whisper to you</p><p>And I'll say</p><p>You don't have to worry 'bout a single thing</p><p>Just let me sing to you</p><p> </p><p>Wow. </p><p>Catra opens her eyes and Adora stops breathing. Golden, honey-brown and tealy-blue lights hold her in place. Damn. She totally knows I’ve been staring. Adora feels her face flush a deep red and sure enough, Catra gives that wicked little smirk that makes her want to keel over. That would be easier. Since when can you find somebody’s TEETH attractive?! It was true. Even her teeth were attractive -something about the pointy-shape of her canines. </p><p> </p><p>No, you don't have to worry 'bout a single thing</p><p>Just let me sing to you</p><p> </p><p>With that look in her eyes, it really is like she’s singing to me…</p><p> </p><p>Now I know you're the type</p><p>Who'd throw my hopes away (throw my hopes away)</p><p>You'd like to shake me up, to break me up night and day</p><p>And you can do what you like</p><p> </p><p>It could just be the sass in the riff, or the sly way Catra keeps grinning at her, or that wink -that deadly wink -that actually makes Adora flop back on the floor and cover her face. She absolutely cannot handle the combination of all three. </p><p> </p><p>I'm not trying to be your one and only</p><p>I'm just trying to make you feel good</p><p>So good </p><p>So good </p><p> </p><p>She’s glad she stayed on the ground. She can’t risk sitting back up and meeting Catra’s gaze while she sings THAT. And the way she freaking said it! She sang “so good” like the embodiment of a shiver -the smoke in her voice threatened to fry Adora’s body up from the inside. She’s totally doing it on purpose but...did she really mean it? Or is she just trying to get a rise out of me?</p><p> </p><p>Oh, but don't bring me down</p><p>Oh, just try to understand me</p><p>Won't you come a little closer and let me whisper to you</p><p>And I'll say</p><p>You don't have to worry 'bout a single thing</p><p>Just let me sing to you<br/>Oh, yeah</p><p>No, you don't have to worry 'bout a single thing</p><p>Just let me sing to you</p><p> </p><p>Adora looks up at her when she hears the definite snap of fingers. Catra’s eyes are closed again and she’s rocking back and forth on beat, snapping her fingers like she’s keeping time. She looks...like she’s actually enjoying it. She looks carefree...happy. </p><p> </p><p>You don't have to worry 'bout a single thing</p><p>Just let me sing to you</p><p>Adora can’t tear her eyes away now. She’s back to staring at the other girl, eyes closed, mouth soft in its formation of syllables. She’s making it look so effortless. Effortlessly beautiful…Catra opens her eyes again and Adora looks away, embarrassed all over again. </p><p>“Then it just repeats.” She slowly takes the headphones off -Adora can feel her eyes boring into her skin. She tries to hand the headphones back to Adora, but she refuses. </p><p>“Uh…” She’s trying to think of some way, any way, to hear more. “You have to do two.” </p><p>“What? Why?” </p><p>“The cancer thing. You gotta make it up to me, remember?” </p><p>Catra rolls her eyes. “I guess.” </p><p>This time, Catra leaves the headphones off and Adora watches her curiously. Again, Catra closes her eyes and gets this focused, intense look on her face -more so this time than the first. Adora is leaned forward with anticipation, waiting somewhat nervously for whatever is going to come next. Is Catra really hearing a song in her head right now? </p><p> </p><p>In an age of darkness light appears</p><p> </p><p>Adora doesn’t recognize the song at first, slow and almost melancholy, drowning in minor tones. </p><p> </p><p>And it wards away the ancient fears</p><p>March to the anthem of the heart</p><p>To a brand new day, a brand new start</p><p> </p><p>Then it clicks. Catra is singing one of Adora’s mom’s favorite rock songs from Greta Van Fleet. In contrast to the original, Catra’s version is almost like a lullaby. Lilting richness in an otherwise empty room has taken the place of loud and bright words over crunchy electric guitars and drum-sticked-cymbals. </p><p> </p><p>To wonderlands of ice and snow</p><p>In the desert heat where nothing grows</p><p>A tree of life in rain and sun</p><p>To reach the sky it's just begun</p><p>And as we came into the clear</p><p>To find ourselves where we are here</p><p>Who is the wiser to help us steer</p><p>And will we know when the end is near?</p><p> </p><p>Adora wills her eyes not to brim with tears and she prays that Catra doesn’t open hers and see.  She totally changed the song into something else -it now had this sort of ethereal beauty that was hard to describe. </p><p> </p><p>Beauty lives in every soul</p><p>The more you love the more you know</p><p>They pass the torch and it still burns</p><p>Once children then it's now our turn</p><p> </p><p>It’s definitely sung like a lullaby, but it’s also dark -a warning. Or maybe it’s just the look on Catra’s face -strained, as if she’s hurting -that makes Adora think this song is hard for her to sing. She wants to reach out and take her hand, but she stops herself just as her fingers twitch to take action. </p><p> </p><p>And as we came into the clear</p><p>To find ourselves where we are here</p><p>Who is the wiser to help us steer</p><p>And will we know when the end is near?</p><p> </p><p>Adora watches and waits for Catra to open her eyes, a tiny bit relieved that she takes her time. It gives Adora time to compose herself at least a little bit more. Catra lets out a breath, almost like a sigh, and it’s like some heavy burden has been lifted from her shoulders. </p><p>“Yo-you’re really good.” </p><p>She shrugs lamely, opening her eyes. “Thanks.” Casual, as if she isn’t good enough to be some recorded artist with ten million plaques on the wall. </p><p>“No, like…” Adora brings herself to make eye contact, which is a mistake. “...REALLY good.” </p><p>The smile dies in her eyes, leaving only a hollow curving of plush lips.“Tsh. Tell that to my mom.” Oops. Didn’t mean to take it there...</p><p>Still, Adora feels the need to stand up for her new friend. Friend? Yes. Friend. She wants to be Catra’s friend. “I mean...I would, if I ever got the chance.” It almost came out as a question. </p><p>Catra blinks at her and Adora can’t gauge the way her expression changed. She’s surprised and...sad? No… upset? There’s a bitterness in her words that make the room just a bit colder. Each one is spoken like her tongue might actually be sharp. “I don’t exactly plan on giving her the chance.” Oh. Adora knows she’s not really upset with her -well...she doesn’t KNOW that, but she doesn’t think Catra’s upset with her -but it still didn’t feel good to suddenly be so shut out. With the way Catra had been all morning, she’d kind of forgotten how closed off she usually was. </p><p>It’s not like she ever planned on meeting Catra’s mom, but if she ever did, Adora knew what she would say. She would tell her how wonderful her daughter is, how much she deserves the world, and how terrible of a job she’s done at parenting so far. </p><p>“You mean give me the chance?” </p><p>Catra shakes her head, an eyebrow twitching up briefly. “No, her.” Adora waits, hoping there might be a bit more explanation this time. Don’t shut me out. Not yet. A few moments of borderline awkward silence pass. Adora almost lets out a sigh of relief when Catra opens her mouth again. “I won’t give her the chance to fuck with anyone else. She’s my problem.” </p><p>Adora isn’t sure what to say. She can’t even imagine what it must be like to not love her mother, let alone like her. She certainly can’t begin to understand what Catra must feel going home and being absolutely miserable. Well...maybe she understands now, but it’s not because of her mother at all. Considering Catra doesn’t have many other friends and it seems like she’s probably never actually talked to anybody else about this, it had to be hard to open up at all. Adora’s happy she elaborated at all, even just that much. “Maybe...but…” What to say...what to say… “you don’t have to go through it all alone. You know that...right?” </p><p>Catra’s eyebrow twitches again and this time it looks like she’s hurting. Again, Adora fights the urge to reach out and take her hand, to find some way to let her know the truth of her previous statement. She can tell Catra’s upset and she wracks her brain for something she can say to bring things back around to a more positive note. “What do you say we play a boardgame?” </p><p>Catra has done that thing again -she’s receded back to whatever dark hiding place she feels safest in and sealed her real self away behind this shell of ‘I-don’t-care’. Adora can see it. She hates it. She wants to reach back in and yank her out and shake her and tell her that it’s okay to be vulnerable. “Eh...it’s been fun princess, but...I should probably get going.” </p><p>Adora’s heart sinks. Oh. </p><p>“What, scared you’ll lose?”</p><p>She’s trying desperately to bait her back into a good headspace, but it’s not working. Catra’s expression is set in stone. “Not at all. In fact, I’m saving you from a horrible defeat. Wouldn’t want your shiny pride to get all scuffed up.” The words still constitute playful banter, but they’re totally flat. </p><p>“I’m a tough girl. I can take it.” Keep trying. </p><p>“Yeah, well, you’re also a hella SICK girl and you should be taking care of herself.” Adora can tell this is a losing battle. She’s not sure what else to say. She doesn’t want to keep Catra here if she really doesn’t want to be here but she wishes the day with her wouldn’t end like this. Come to think of it, she has hardly noticed how she was the whole time they were together -and awake- today. Catra’s presence definitely made her feel better. </p><p>“Are you gonna go home?” Okay, so that was an unfair question. She shouldn’t have asked it, but it was the only other thing she could think that might make Catra rethink. Oh no. I REALLY like Catra...she’s so not interested in me…</p><p>“Nah. I’m gonna go hand with Entrapta and Scorpia.” Liar. “I told them I’d show up after school.” </p><p>“Yeah, but it’s only like…” Adora searches the room for a clock. How is it already after three? I must have slept for a long time. “Oh...I guess, yeah, school would be out.” That explains why my phone has been blowing up. </p><p>“Yeah.” A few quiet moments pass and it almost seems like Catra doesn’t want to go either, but eventually she stands. “I’ll see you around, princess.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I think the next chapter will actually be the last. It's just gonna be some fluffy, fluffy anxt.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Being Grateful</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Catra has an internal freak out, but pulls her head out of her ass when she overhears Adora talking to her friends about their encounter.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So...you guys win. This won't be the last chapter for this. *eye roll* I do this every time! It's too good to just leave here. I have to keep going. I do have a clear end scene in mind though -it's super cute. You're all gonna love it. </p><p>Sorry I've been MIA. I know I keep saying that I'm working on the end of With You, and I swear I am. The writer's block is REAL, your honor. And I don't want to give you guys a forced and ill-suited ending to what is otherwise a really good story. I went back and re-read ALL of it -and there were a lot of little spelling and grammar errors, oops -but damn y'all! That was some QUALITY anxty teenage BS I wrote. There were some heart-wrenching references if I do say so myself :) All that to say: I love that fic and I want to end it right -Please bear with me!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In her defense, it wasn’t technically a lie. She really did go see Scorpia -after about two hours of milling about aimlessly, daydreaming about living literally anywhere else. She knew Adora meant nothing by it, but for some reason just the thought of Adora and her mother in the same room was dreadful. More than just stark contrast from one another, they didn’t even belong in the same cosmos -which, by logic, meant that Catra and Adora didn’t belong in the same general sphere either. Obviously the notion that Catra was decent enough to earn time with Adora was the preferred lie, but a lie nonetheless. She knew they didn’t belong together. </p><p>So then why? Why did Adora make her feel so...normal? Why did Adora make her feel...worth something? And for fuck’s sake, WHY did Catra actually let herself beleive it for a day? How stupid could you get? Adora was just that nice to everyone -that’s why everybody loves her so much. She’s Miss Sunshine all the time. She definitely just pities you, jackass. But then Catra remembers that soft smile -the way her cheeks flush, sometimes for no reason at all. Why did she look at me like that? Why do I care so much? </p><p>Because you’re both just lonely -that’s literally it. The answer was certainly not what she wanted to hear, but it was the one she needed to hear. She needed to hear that they were just both being dumb, hormonal, anxty teenagers. She didn’t need somebody like Adora in her life -not really -and Adora DEFINITELY didn’t need or want somebody like Catra in hers. They were just using each other for company, and that’s bullshit she really didn’t care to deal with right now. She had other puzzles to solve -like what she was going to do if her mother was awake when she got home tonight. </p><p>Catra ends up staying the night at Scorpia’s, which wasn’t nearly as awful as last time. It seemed like Scorpia was actually starting to get the message that, sometimes, people just need their fucking space. Maybe it was the shiner on display, or maybe she looked as tired as she felt, dragging her feet everywhere -but Scorpia was significantly less annoying than she usually was and Catra was thankful for it. That made it all the more frustrating that she had a terrible time sleeping. In fact, she wasn’t sure that she slept at all that night. She would close her eyes and feel right on the edge, and then BAM! Adora would pop in her freaking head. Adora with her stupidly blue eyes and her stupid sunshine hair and that goddamn smile. She was maddening. </p><p>Unfortunately, Adora’s persistence didn’t just remain in her head. For the next two weeks, Catra avoids her at all cost, but it seemed like Adora just had this homing beacon -she could always find her, once a day, at least. Near the bleachers, hidden in an empty classroom at lunch, the oldest girls bathroom even! Whenever Catra’s cornered, their interactions are forced and awkward as hell because she can’t ever decide if she wants to be a cold bitch or not -her body is telling her one thing and her head is screaming another. So when Adora walks away, either confused or somewhat dejected, Catra feels a twinge of guilt and satisfaction simultaneously. I’m saving you from yourself, Adora. Hanging around me will only bring you down, trust me. <br/>You’d think that after a while, things would change, right? Adora should get tired of all the discomfort and ill-attempted jokes that never land, but no. She just keeps on coming. Catra isn't blind. She sees the way Adora’s friends watch them whenever Adora finds her -they have no idea why Adora even bothers -she’s heard them ask as much. It causes the small, cold stones in Catra’s stomach to grow just a little every time. And then finally -FINALLY -Adora seems to get it. Their last sort-of conversation must have finally gotten through to her that they absolutely couldn’t work as friends. </p><p>Except now, rather than trying to strike up conversation, Adora just watches her. Catra catches glimpses of Adora watching her from across the classroom, or following her as she crosses the commons to the hallway. Sometimes, when she’s skipping class early and walking across the field to the parking lot, she swears she feels Adora staring at her from a window somewhere, asking ‘Where are you going? Why are you skipping?”. What she sees when Adora watches her is a kind of sadness she hates more than anything -the kind that says “this is your fault”. Catra just wished she could disappear. </p><p>So one day she does. She just walks out of her boring ass history class and sulks under the bleachers. It’s not very warm, but she doesn’t mind that -she actually sort of enjoys the false sense of warmth that comes with numbness. She gets lost in it for some unknown amount of time, closing her eyes and just feeling her body as she listens to little raindrops tic-tic-tic, pattering against the cold metal above. Her concentration on that is only broken when she hears voices approaching. Was school out? She hadn’t even heard the bell. The remain murmured until they get closer. Then she heard the clanging of shoes on the bleachers, walking closer towards her, distorting the voices until they slow and stop. </p><p>“You could do better, is all I’m saying.” It’s a male voice.. </p><p>“And all I’M saying is that you guys really don’t know her.” Adora?</p><p>“Neither do you. You spent, what, like...twelve hours with her, and now you’re obsessed!” Catra recognizes Glimmer Brightmoon’s voice. She groans inwardly. “I’m not sure how.” </p><p>“I’m not obsessed with her!” Definitely Adora. But...who are they talking about? Why the fuck do I care? I don’t. “Look, the point is, I’d LIKE to get to know her better, that’s all.” Catra sort of sits up against a support, as if it will help her hear any better. </p><p>“I know we literally just finished talking about how I always side with Glimmer, and I still disagree with that, BUT I have to agree with Glim on this one.” </p><p>Adora’s voice goes sort of shrill -Catra can’t picture it.“See! YOU TOTALLY DO!” </p><p>“No, listen! Glimmer’s right. She’s totally been ignoring you since then.” Oh...they must be talking about me. “Even if that’s not meant to be an outright rejection, at the very least it’s not a good sign.” There’s a pause. “I don’t think she wants to get to know you.” </p><p>Catra’s not sure how she’s supposed to feel listening to this. They definitely have to be talking about her. She’s not sure who’s side she wants to be one. </p><p>“That’s just this thing she does though, and-” </p><p>“Well it’s a stupid thing and it’s childish and unfair to you and your feelings.” Fuck you. I’m not childish.</p><p>“But she doesn’t know I HAVE…’feelings’.” Why did Adora say it like that? Feelings. Feelings? Or like...FEELINGS? Did it matter? No. Yes. “She was… totally different when it was just the two of us.” Catra hates that the tone of Adora’s voice makes her feel guilty again. “I...I really enjoyed spending time with her. It’s hard to explain but...she just....it was REAL and she made me feel...normal.” </p><p>Somewhere in the back of her brain, a dark veil of denial slipped off the compartmentalized box labelled “belonging”, waking up all those foreign feelings she experienced that night. She remembered that warm fuzzy glow inside her chest that told her she was content for once. She remembered feeling heard, feeling SEEN. The thought that Adora felt the same thing was downright unbelievable.   </p><p>“Well...I can’t stop you, and...Catra’s the first person I've ever heard you really express interest in like this so...I might as well support you.” </p><p>There it was. Her name rang in her ears just a little bit longer, almost like it was echoed by every little pitter-patter droplet for the few seconds afterwards. And then it hits her: Adora is...interested in her? Adora wasn’t trying to hang out because she pitied her -she just wanted to get to know her better? For real? </p><p>“Thanks Bow.” </p><p>“Have you talked to your mom about it?” </p><p>“Yesterday.” Catra feels another sharp twinge of guilt. She can imagine the face Adora is making right now -pained to talk about this, yet she does it anyways. </p><p>“And?” </p><p>“She mumbled something about knowing for a long time, but I’m not sure if she really got it. She was...pretty out of it.”  </p><p>Silence. </p><p>“I’m so sorry, Adora.” Oh, don’t say that. She hates that. Catra knows she hates that. </p><p>“It’s okay.” It was very obviously not okay. The awkward silence that follows is longer than the last. </p><p>“So...are you gonna ask her out?” Catra feels her own cheeks burn against the cold air. So by ‘interest’, they meant...</p><p>“What? No!” </p><p>“Why not?” </p><p>“Because she’s -it’s -I don’t even know if she likes girls.” Catra can’t fight the smile threatening to break across her face. Adora even SOUNDS like she’s blushing right now. </p><p>“Adora, a solid fifty percent of straight girls in this school turn their heads when you walk in the room. The odds are in your favor.” True. </p><p>“Yeah, besides. You don’t need to know if she’s into girls. You need to know if she’s into YOU, which you’ll learn when you ASK her.” </p><p>“Pshf. I can’t just -ASK her -THAT. ‘Hey, Catra! What’s up? Do you like me?’ That’s stupid!” </p><p>“How exactly is she supposed to ask Catra anything if Catra won’t even give her the time of day?” Catra tries not to roll her eyes at that obnoxious voice, but then the words settle in and she’s even more peeved. Goddammit. Now she felt like a huge dick. And an idiot. Catra had been denying her own hopes because she thought there was no chance in hell that Adora would have any kind of genuine interest in her -of any kind, friendly or otherwise. She denied it so hard that she shot Adora down for no good reason other than a failed attempt at fearful self-preservation. </p><p>“Well she hasn’t given up yet. Besides, what’s stupid is never taking the chance if you really think you two clicked.” </p><p>Catra lets that sink in. Shit...she royally screwed up.</p><p>Adora sounds thoughtful. “You miss one hundred percent of the shots you don’t take.” </p><p>“Exactly.” </p><p>“Guhhhhh.” Glimmer groans. “I hate that you just used that quote for this!” </p><p>“It’s my favorite quote!” </p><p>“I know, I know! It’s a good quote, goddammit.” </p><p>“You like the quote? Glimmer likes my quote?” Adora was definitely the cute friend of this trio. Hell, she was probably the cute friend of any group. </p><p>“Yes, I like the stupid quote.” </p><p>“Glimmer likes the quo-ote! Glimmer likes the quo-ote!-” </p><p>“What I DON’T like, is the prospect of spending more time with you-know-who.” Is she talking about me? SHE doesn’t want to spend time with ME? That spoiled little-</p><p>“I think you’ll really get to like her once she opens up.” Once she opens up. Adora said that like she’s so sure, like it’s no big deal. </p><p>“I think I’ll really like not freezing my ass off. Can we go to Sharis now? Papa needs his pie shake.” </p><p>“Well you wouldn’t be so cold if you weren’t wearing a cropped sweatshirt, Bow.” Catra recognized the name and could immediately put a name to a face. This guy sounded way smarter than she assumed he was. He truly did walk around in crop-everythings, every day, all times of the year. </p><p>“It’s called FASHION, and for your information, it’s VERY THICK.” </p><p>There’s a pause and then Adora gives a thoughtful, “Huh...that is thicker than I expected.” </p><p>“Right?” </p><p>“Alright, come on you two.” There’s scuffling and clanging as somebody picks up something they’d set down and footsteps thunder down to the far end of the bleachers. </p><p>“I’ve got another one just like it in red. Adora, you should try it -it would look really good on you.” </p><p>“HA! Dude, you know that’s so not my…”  Catra waited until the voices fade away before she dared move from where she’d been sitting to stretch her legs. She replays it all in her head over and over again. Every time she thinks about Adora getting flustered and saying “I can’t just ask her that!”, she gets a little jolt of excitement. How could she have been so stupid? If you find a lucky penny, you pick it up. If the sun comes out for ten minutes in the middle of November, you take a walk. If the universe offers an opportunity to spend time with the dumb, lovable blonde of your literal dreams, you don’t say no -you just say thank you. </p><p>And so, Catra made up her mind -she would approach Adora and try to make it right. But how the fuck was she supposed to do that? She couldn’t let on that she’d overheard that conversation and it’s not exactly like they were on speaking terms -by nobody’s fault but her own. What would she even say? What COULD she say? In that moment, Catra realized she had never apologized to anyone before, for anything. And she had done some shitty shit. Damn. </p><p>She spent almost the next twenty-four hours thinking about how this might go, what she might say, what ADORA might say -if anything. Maybe Adora wouldn’t say anything. What if Adora changed her mind? What if she realized Catra was a lost cause? What it-Stop. That’s exactly how this happened in the first place. She decided she wasn’t going to give herself the opportunity to back out -that was the only way this would work. Or maybe it would be more accurate to say that Adora wouldn’t give her the opportunity to back out -thankfully. She caught up to Catra at lunch on her way outside to the bleachers, nearly knocking into her. She had a few stray bangs falling from her golden ponytail that drew attention to her face where they framed it -the sparkle in her eyes nearly unbearable.</p><p>“Hey, Catra!” She sounded almost out of breath -and very, very nervous. “Hey, I was, uh…” Catra really wanted to know what she was going to say, but if she didn’t let loose all the words that had bounced around her head for the last several hours, she would implode and disappear. Then again, maybe that would be easier…</p><p>“I’ve been meaning to talk to you, actually.” Adora stopped and stood still, somewhat concerned. Catra cleared her throat. “Look...I just wanted…” Suddenly it was like all those words were poofed away somewhere else, leaving her empty-headed except for that look in Adora’s eyes, reflecting off every wall around them and piercing her soul. God her eyes are blue. “I wanted to say that I’m-I’ve…” She exhales to find some kind of clarity. “I’ve been a dick. I’m sorry.” </p><p>Adora blinks at her for a moment before she seems to perk up and smile and Catra can’t take how fast of a turnaround it is. She thoroughly needs for Adora to tell her she’s right -she HAS been a dick, and how could she do that? But no, Adora looks like she’s about to say that she never even noticed, which Catra knows is a lie, or ‘it’s okay’, which is also bullshit. That’s what Adora always says to people when they use her, inconvenience her or burden her. Catra can’t stand that. So she says the only thing that seems natural. “Do you still need math help?” </p><p>Adora rubs the back of her neck, embarrassed. “I mean...yeah. I did really bad on the quiz last week.” </p><p>“Doubtful.” Like you’ve ever earned a bad grade in your life, princess. </p><p>Adora shakes her head. “No, really like...I got two out of ten.” </p><p>“Oh, shit!” </p><p>“Yeah.” </p><p>“When do you wanna start?” The sparkle in Adora’s eyes becomes motion that puts the stars to shame as she smiles shyly. “I mean, I could -if you could, that is -maybe tonight?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Stay tuned to find out how disaster Adora studies math. </p><p>ALSO: I hope that all of you are staying well and safe and you're still having good holidays and finding things to celebrate even though the COVID depression is super real for a lot of people this winter.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Study Date?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>They argue about the word Panties?</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This wasn't supposed to go down the way it did, but *shrug* I'm not mad at it. Enjoy this totally unscripted scene.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Adora barely paid any attention at practice -she was too busy stealing glances up into the bleachers where Catra was sitting, waiting for her. Waiting, for HER. The only way she could think to describe the bubbly feeling inside her chest was giddy -or maybe it would be better to say the very atoms of her body were active, buzzing with excitement and ready to burst, but tethered together by incredibly strong ropes of nervousness. That was definitely new -the nervousness. Adora wasn’t inherently a nervous person. Sure, she ‘worried’ about things sometimes, but she only ever had one speed in life -GO- and she never gave herself time to be nervous, because by the time she got around to thinking about the thing, it was already happening. But not right now. Now she had time -time to sit here and feel those eyes on her and KNOW that they were going to be alone together again soon. </p><p>Maybe that’s why she wasn’t this giddy around Catra before -because there wasn’t a cold chance in hell that she would actually have to ask Catra out on a date and risk rejection so as long as Catra wasn’t talking to her -it wasn’t in the cards. But now...now they were on good terms and she was acutely aware of all the feelings messing with her head. She had to own up to it, right? Suddenly there was so much that could go wrong...or right. Such a nerve wracking thought. And Catra was the one who initiated it! Why did she change her mind anyways? Did it matter? Kind of. Well...no...maybe not. Maybe she was just lonely? That would suck. But then she chose me to hang out with, and that’s a good sign. </p><p>Adora just about made herself sick going back and forth -almost more than the ball her body was trying to keep up with, but the physical strain helped. When she had to focus particularly hard and work for it, there was less room for self-doubt. When practice ends though, she’s unsure as to whether the shakiness in her legs is from that last run or from the smirk Catra is giving her. Am I that obvious? Does she know I’ve been thinking about her? </p><p>“You looked a little distracted out there.” Gulp. Apparently. </p><p>Just be cool, Adora. Be cool. “I guess I’m just not used to having a fan section.” </p><p>Catra crosses her arms over her chest. “Pff. Please. Yes you are.” </p><p>Adora isn’t sure what to say. She can’t agree or she’ll be cocky, so she just changes the subject entirely, doing her very best not to seem as squirrely as she feels. “I’m super hungry. What do you want for dinner?” She starts walking towards the parking lot slowly -the brunette follows. </p><p>“Food.” </p><p>She could work with that. “Sounds good to me.” </p><p>Conversation comes easily in the car, flowing from one thing to the next -jumping occasionally, but not in a way that feels forced. And when Catra laughs…oh, man -Adora could fly. The bubbles would carry her up, up and away if it weren’t for the seatbelt holding her down. She feels much better knowing that at least it’s not all in her head -they really do seem to get along well when they’re together. </p><p>Talk ceases just long enough to rock out to some Shinedown. Catra is entirely different this car ride compared to the last -she’s singing along with a smile on her face, playing air guitar and drums. She’s being kind of goofy and Adora is doing everything in her power not to turn down the music and just hear Catra’s voice. Even over the blaring cymbals and amplified guitars, she knows she sounds good.</p><p>When they pull into the driveway, Adora takes note of the brunette’s slightly damp, balled up sweatshirt in her lap and the bag at her feet. She feels a twinge of guilt. Catra sat out there waiting for her in the drizzle -at least it wasn’t raining super hard. She watches Catra tuck the sweatshirt under her arm as she reaches for the strap of her pack on the floor. She’s got her hands full. “Uh, wait!” </p><p>Catra freezes. “Okay?” Adora practically jumps out of the car and jaunts around to the other side to open the other girl’s door. She gives Adora an incredulous look, that tiny little smile line above the corner of her curling lip wiping away all the blonde’s thoughts. “Man, if I didn’t know better, I’d think you were taking me on a date.” </p><p>Adora blushes madly, feeling embarrassed. Yeah, I guess that is what people do on dates. “ I’m just trying to be polite. I feel kinda bad that you waited around in the rain for me.” </p><p>Catra steps out. “I’ve never felt like such a lady. Keep in comin’.” </p><p>Be cool, Adora. Be cool. </p><p>They step inside and Adora is glad she’s actually been able to keep up with cleaning. She even unpacked the box that had been cluttering the corner since she moved in here. Thankfully Catra hadn’t seemed to notice the heap of laundry that desperately needed to get done. She slung her bag against the base of the counter and flopped on the futon, looking quite comfortable. That made Adora feel better -five feet in the door and she looked like she enjoyed being here -being with her. </p><p>“So...are baked veggies and chicken good for dinner?” </p><p>Catra shrugged. “Sounds great.” </p><p>“Awesome.” </p><p>“What can I do?” </p><p>Adora smiled remembering the other girl’s pancakes. “I dunno, what CAN you do?” </p><p>“Hey! Asshole. I will have you know that I have many talents.” She clearly wasn’t offended. </p><p>The blonde dug around the fridge for brussel sprouts and carrots. “Like what?” </p><p>“I’ve been told that I have a knack for getting under people’s skin.” </p><p>“Fine, I’ll give you that.” </p><p>Catra scoffed and pressed a hand to her chest, faking shock. It made Adora giggle to see her so animated. “I’m hurt.”</p><p>“You said it!” </p><p>“Yeah, but you weren’t supposed to agree!” She came around to the other side of the counter where Adora had laid out vegetables over the one large cutting board she owned. “You were supposed to be all like, ‘oh, no. Not you. You’re so amazing.’” Part of Adora wondered if some part of Catra took her seriously. She should have just started listing all the real talents Catra demonstrated. </p><p>“HA! Was that supposed to be me? Do I really sound like that?” </p><p>“Pfft. Pretty much.” </p><p>“Do not.” She started chopping -Catra’s eyes followed her hands. </p><p>“Okay, no you don’t.” </p><p>“That’s what I thought.” This felt natural. </p><p>“But really though, can I help?” Adora let her gaze go where it had been pulled since they walked in the door, to meet one honeyed-amber eye and one ocean-teal. If the color wasn’t striking enough, then their shape certainly was. In fact, the whole of Catra’s features came together to create the most emphatic piece of art Adora had ever laid eyes on. Something about Catra’s everything was just so...ALIVE. That was the word. That’s what Catra was. </p><p>Adora only realized she’d been staring when Catra raised her eyebrows as if to re-emphasize her question. Adora cleared her throat in response and tore her gaze away from the other girl’s face. “You could…” She looked around. “...wash those carrots and the sweet potatoes while I cut these.” </p><p>“Okay.” </p><p>It didn’t take long -they made a good team. Once the veggies were in the oven, Adora seasoned the chicken and threw the breasts in a skillet with a sizzle. She was glad that Catra seemed to be impressed by every little thing, and for once she didn’t mind that she wasn’t like her peers. She knew how to cook and clean and take care of herself -to provide. For some reason, with Catra that didn’t feel isolating or bad -it felt nice. </p><p>In the time it took the veggies to finish, they split a rootbeer and listened to a few more songs and Catra sang openly again. Adora just marvelled, at point open mouthed. The timer going off spared her from whatever trance the brunette cast -she practically ran for the oven mits. </p><p>“Jeez dude. Hungry much?” </p><p>“Chyeah.” Actually, I am super hungry. It had been about six hours since lunch. She wondered what Catra even had for lunch…</p><p>“Well, I can help set up.” </p><p>“No, it’s fine, I got it.” She caught herself, not wanting Catra to feel slighted. “And before you get your underwear in a bunch, it’s just because I’m already here, not because I don’t think you can do it.” </p><p>Catra froze, a grin spreading across her face and revealing a row of beautifully bright teeth. “I’m sorry. My WHAT?”</p><p>Adora was confused, but then self-conscious. The glint of mischief mocking her kindly pulled at her heart strings and made her blush. “You know, it’s a saying-” </p><p>Catra shook her head. “Nu-nu-no. The saying is don’t get your panties in a bunch.” Adora started to pile the cooked vegetables onto their plates, her stomach giving a loud rumble at the smell. </p><p>“Ew. I hate that word.” </p><p>“What, panties?” </p><p>“Yeah.” </p><p>“You’d rather say UNDER-WEAR, than PANTIES. What are you, like five?” </p><p>Adora shook her head. “Panties just sounds so...uck.” It really did. The ‘t’ was too harsh and it sounded like a word Razz would say. It was such an old lady word. </p><p>“Literally, what? UNDER-WEAR sounds hella gross. Super not sexy.” She followed Adora to the table with their plates. Why does it need to be sexy? </p><p>“Well, yeah it’s weird when you say it all emphasized like that.” </p><p>“Well, it’s weird that you say panties all emphasize like that.” </p><p>“But saying it not like that doesn’t make it any better -then it’s just like…” She took out the ‘t’ sound. “Pannies.” She crinkled her nose. “That rhymes with Granny. That just doesn’t sound right either. I think if anything, that’s what’s not sexy.” </p><p>“No! Panties is a way better sexy word. Underwear is so childish, are you kidding? What do you think of when you hear the word underwear?” </p><p>She handed Catra a fork and immediately shovelled one of either vegetable in her mouth. “Uh... my underwear?” </p><p>“Helpful.” </p><p>“You asked!” </p><p>“I mean like…” Catra gave an exasperated sigh. “Okay, what about panties. What do you think of then?” </p><p>Adora cut off a chunk of chicken. She knew it was impolite to talk with her mouth full, but she was really hungry and Catra didn’t seem offended. “Like...old people underwear.” </p><p>“What?! HOW. I think of thongs and lace and shit.” Gulp. Adora never really wore that stuff though. She wore spandex and boyshorts because that’s what was comfortable. Did Catra wear thongs and lace and shit? What other shit even was there? Like...lingerie? </p><p>Adora shrugged, “Even if the thing it’s talking about is supposed to be sexy, I just don’t hear it. It’s not a sexy word.” </p><p>“Bet.” </p><p>“It’s not!” </p><p>That was the moment Adora knew she’d made a mistake -the very moment she made eye contact with the girl across the table. She was doing that thing with her eyes -she looked playful but competitive -daring. Adora watched as she skillfully hid her smirk behind somewhat relaxed lips, bit her nail just long enough to draw attention to the tongue behind her teeth, and then sprung the trap. “Panties.” </p><p>It wasn’t the word that made Adora forget how to use a fork, it was her VOICE. She could have said anything -any word in the English language. Hell, she could have said something in ANY language and Adora’s brain would have short-circuited. That rasp was dangerous. </p><p>She simply sat on the other side and basked in the chaos she caused inside of Adora -the smirk on her face was proof that she was enjoying the shock that had to be painted on Adora’s face. Say something, idiot. </p><p>“That doesn’t count.” </p><p>Catra took her first bite, still smiling. Adora’s eyes followed her fork, inexorably drawn to the other girl’s lips -like she’d forgotten they existed before. Well...no...she never did. “What do you mean that doesn’t count? Did you find it sexy?” </p><p>Obviously, Adora couldn’t answer that directly. “You can’t just say it like that and not say underwear the same.” </p><p>“Say it like what?” </p><p>Adora pushed some sweet potato around her plate. “Like...THAT.” It felt like Catra was watching her, waiting for her to make eye contact again. She caved, finding the brunette still smirking that painfully attractive little grin. This felt like another game of chicken. Adora wouldn’t lose. </p><p>“Well, whatever. Either way, it was bold of you to assume I was wearing any.” </p><p>Adora almost choked. Her eyes immediately darted down Catra’s body before she could stop them, only to be horrified by three things: 1) she actually tried to look 2) the table blocked whatever view their might have been visible otherwise 3) Catra was still watching her. “Ohhhh my god, dude, did you just try to check and see if I was wearing any?” </p><p>“No!” Her face burned. Noooo. </p><p>“You totally did!” Catra was smiling -really smiling with genuine enjoyment of whatever the hell this awful moment of embarrassment was. </p><p>“I was just- it -I was surprised!” </p><p>Catra took another bite, still smiling. “I’d say take me to dinner first but you already did, so it’s cool.” She winked and Adora wanted to melt into the floor and then fall between the cracks of the floorboards and just spend the rest of her days as a little puddle in the dirt. “Wow, this sweet potato is so good. I guess I figured they’d be more...sweet?” </p><p>Thank God. Yes, please talk about anything else. “Yeah, you can make them more savory.” </p><p>“You know what is sweet though?” </p><p>Uh-oh. She had that look. Adora almost didn’t ask. “What?” </p><p>“How red your face gets.” UUUUUGH. Adora put her forehead down on the table. “Did you know even the tips of your ears turn pink?” </p><p>“Catraaaaaa.” She didn’t look up. </p><p>“What? It’s cute.” Cute? Embarrassing, is what it is. </p><p>“You’re mean.” It was said without a trace of conviction and she hoped Catra would pick up on that. </p><p>Adora could hear the smile in Catra’s soft honeyed voice. “Awuh. I’m sorry, princess. I’ll leave you alone.”</p><p>The thought nearly sent a jolt of panic through her. The blonde turned her head on the table to look up at other girl, whose features had softened and now shown the same kind of wicked beauty, but with genuine care. “It’s okay. I know I’m easy to pick on. Bow and Glimmer say stuff like that all the time.” </p><p>Catra nodded. “I mean it, you’re cute.” Ba-dup. Of course that sent another wave of heat over her face. Thankfully, Catra didn’t seem to think it was noteworthy -probably because she was already as red as she could get. “And you know what they say, us mean kids pick on people we like.” </p><p>Adora stopped breathing for just a moment -even Catra seemed sort of taken back by what she said. ‘Like’ as in how I like her? Like as in a friend? Like as in...more than that? Through some miracle -maybe it was the boost of hope coursing through her veins -Adora lifted her head off the table and quipped back. “You like me? That’s so embarrassing for you.” </p><p>Catra cocked an eyebrow and took another bite. “I won’t be saying it again.” Adora beamed. However Catra meant it, she MEANT it, and that was enough.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is already becoming so much longer than I'd expected ha. There are so many more on my list that I'd like to explore. So...I guess by the end of all of this I'll have like thousands of pages of Catradora content???</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Imaginary Numbers</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Study date gone right :)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Enjoy :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>At this point, there was no way in hell Adora WASN’T into her -Catra was sure of it. She seemed to alternate back and forth between being a kind of playfulness that was awfully close to cockiness, and absolutely dissolving into a bashful puddle of incoherency the moment Catra so much as smiled directly at her. It was the most amazing thing -SHE was the most amazing thing. The pink of her cheeks starkly contrasted against the sparkling blue of her eyes -both of which gave her this...look. Genuinely innocent; undeniably kissable. Ah, shit. </p><p>Adora was really fucking pretty. And she smelled good. That was weird, right? Catra shouldn’t be smelling her - but it wasn’t her fault! They were sitting close enough that she could read Adora’s book problems and see her attempted answers, and that was close enough. Adora hadn’t showered after practice and that had to be why her skin smelled so strongly -not stinky, not bad. Just strong. It was...warm? Yeah, warm. And kind of sweet -not anything at all like what Catra would expect from a jock. Why the hell did the locker rooms smell so gross if they all smelled like her? </p><p>Whenever Adora turned her head quickly, her ponytail would give an especially dramatic swish and the brunette got hit with another waft. If Catra buried her face in that neck- which was very close now -she would want to stay there, she could tell. It was a really comforting smell somehow, even though it made her kind of...nervous? Excited? Either way, at least she wasn’t alone. Adora seemed VERY nervous, and very determined. She was sitting sort of stiffly with her feet under her butt, that square jaw clenching and unclenching as she tried to keep her eyes on the page, fingers practically strangling her poor mechanical pencil. She has nice hands... </p><p>But no, Catra had to focus -she’s supposed to be helping. Problem 16.4. Adora had been staring at her paper for far too long now, trying to figure out what to do. This girl really did need math help. She seemed to be missing a bunch of little things because she was missing the basics. </p><p>“Why isn’t this making sense?”</p><p>Catra leaned in closer -dangerously close. “Lemme see.” Her eyes scan over Adora’s handwriting, which is very pretty, but what she’s written indeed makes zero sense for the problem. </p><p>“So...for this unit, it’s all about imaginary numbers, right?” </p><p>Adora furrowed her eyebrows. “Right. So...I was supposed to do that thing again?” </p><p>Catra nods. “Yeah. This one is going to have three complex roots.” </p><p>“Why?” </p><p>“Because it’s got three degrees.” </p><p>“How do I figure that out again?” </p><p>Catra somehow managed not to laugh. “You just look at the equation.” Adora didn’t seem to notice which is good. She tapped her pencil over the polynomial as if to count. </p><p>“Oh, okay. I guess that makes sense.” She sits and tries to rework the problem again. Catra just looks around the room, or her nails -which desperately need a new paint job -trying not to watch the other girl’s profile until the silence gets broken once more by a frustrated sigh. </p><p>“I thought I got it but I totally don’t. Can you…” Adora turns and Catra feels like they’re both just being pulled together, or maybe pushed, but either way, she can’t stop that inexplicable force drawing her closer. “Can you do this one too, so I can see it? I think that would help.” And just like that, Catra’s drowning in blue -but it’s not as cold as it should be, not icy like the color. The feeling is warm and soft -intimate. </p><p>She can’t break the trance and her mouth seems like it’s going to stumble when creating any sounds at all, but somehow she manages a smooth, “Anything for you, princess.” Adora’s cheeks brighten just a little and her eyes are shifting back and forth to meet Catra’s. </p><p>She was used to that. People always stared at her eyes, but never like this. They all looked at her the way people oogle reptiles in the zoo, but Adora was just...appreciating. It felt kind of incredible. </p><p>She leans in slightly and reaches her hand to the pencil. Without trying -or better yet, against her will -her fingers fall down on top of Adora’s. The contact causes a bolt of lightning to strike her heart and make it beat double-time. She expected Adora to let go, but she didn't. Catra turns back to face her to find those pools of blue lower, sort of unfocused now. My mouth. She’s staring at my mouth. </p><p>Catra panics at the thought of actually kissing this girl, and clears her throat. Adora’s gaze snaps back up to meet Catra’s, then follows her line of sight to their nearly joined hands. “Can I, uh...use this?” </p><p>The blonde lets go in a cartoonish exaggeration of motion, her cheeks darkening another two shades. “Ah, sorry! I, uh, was thinking…” She starts to stand, awkwardly laughing. “I really need to pee. So -” She claps her hands. “I’m just gonna...go do that. Now.” </p><p>As Adora hurriedly disappeared into the bathroom, Catra bites her lip, wishing she hadn’t cleared her throat. It takes a few moments to stave off the idea before she can concentrate enough to do this problem. It doesn’t take her long though, which is good because it gives her enough time to casually stand and stretch before Adora comes back out. Now it doesn’t look like I was sitting there thinking about kissing her. </p><p>And then Catra asks herself why she didn’t. It’s obvious they’re both thinking about it. </p><p>Because it would never work out. Because she’s little-miss-popular and I’m a nobody. But why does that matter? It doesn’t have to be anything, right? It could just be fun. That did sound nice -they could both probably use some fun before they leave this hellhole town. </p><p>When Adora does finally come out of the bathroom -still looking very flustered -Catra has decided she’ll be the one to make the first move. “Feeling better?” </p><p>Adora gives a meek, “Yeah” before sitting back down in front of the coffee table. Catra leans in closer than before under the pretense of showing her the problem. Adora sort of stiffens as their arms touch. The brunette makes sure to keep them pressed together as she explains each step she took, walking Adora through it. </p><p>“Does that make sense?” </p><p>Adora hesitates. “Yeah.” God, she’s fucking cute. </p><p>“You don’t sound so sure.” </p><p>“It does, really. I’m just -” She shakes her head. “I guess I’m just kind of distracted, sorry.” Catra is pleased with herself, holding back a smirk. </p><p>“What’s got you so distracted?” She lifts her eyes to Adora’s profile, that jaw muscle clenched. </p><p>Adora turns slowly, eyes downcast at first. “I- well, it’s just…” Their attentions meet again and that pull is inevitable. “I…” She’s looking at my mouth again. “Uhm…” </p><p>Catra sweeps the beautiful face not three inches from her own for any stop signs, any red flags. She finds none. Adora seems to be struggling just as hard, if not harder, to keep the distance between them. This is her chance. She leans in at what feels like an excruciatingly slow pace, but she knows it’s not. She just wants to give the other girl a chance to pull away if she doesn’t want this. But please don’t pull away.</p><p>When their lips first meet, it’s feather light -much more careful than the sort-of-but-not-really kiss they shared at the party. She realizes she’s been holding her breath when she hears Adora’s hitch. She tilts her head so that they can both just  breathe for a second, foreheads together, before backing up slowly, cursing the way her fingers seem to tremble in their fists at her side. It shouldn’t have been that fucking good. </p><p>Adora’s eyebrows are furrowed again as her eyelashes flutter. She shakes her head. “I’m sorry. I...shouldn’t have done that.” </p><p>Catra scoffs. I kissed you, idiot. But then the words sink in and her heart drops. “Oh.” It was a mistake. </p><p>The other girl’s eyes widened, seeming to sense her disappointment. “No! Not, you know, like THAT. I just meant…” She sighs. “I’ve been hoping to talk to you because I wanted -well, only if you want -” She shakes her head again. As cute as she is stumbling like this, Catra really wished Adora could just say what she meant. “I really like hanging out with you and...I was just wondering…” Now she seems to be taking her time, like she’s watching her feet on a rickety bridge. “...if you...like... girls?” </p><p>She feels bad for laughing -Adora looks so serious -but she couldn’t help it. “You’re such a dork.” Adora’s eyes fall and she looks like she took that as a rejection. Catra has to recover. “I like YOU.” </p><p>Those pools of blue rise back up, hopeful and disbelieving. “Really?’ </p><p>Catra rolls her eyes. “Damn. I said I wouldn’t tell you again, but here I am. Yes, I like you, dumbass. I just kissed you and that’s what you wanna ask?” </p><p>Adora gives her the softest look and it causes her chest to ache from something she doesn’t understand. “Yeah -I mean, no. I’ve...I’ve been wanting to ask you out...like...on, on a date.” </p><p>Catra can’t help the smile from spreading on her face. “Isn’t this already a study date? You brought me back to your place and made me dinner, and now we’re studying together and you’re totally going to kiss me again.” </p><p>“I-I am?” Catra bit her lip and nodded in response, motioning for Adora to come closer again. “Okay…” She leans in and Catra’s heart soars. </p><p>She lifts her hands to hold Adora’s face, enjoying how soft the skin is against her fingers. For a moment she worries Adora might pull away, that maybe this is too much, but she doesn’t. She keeps leaning in. </p><p>Last time, their kiss was a spark -a gateway to something more if conditions were right. This time it’s a flame, starting slow, gentle and warm. But as Adora continues to lean over her, pressing harder into the kiss and tilting her head just a little more to grant her better access, the fire spreads. It makes its way through Catra’s veins until she’s laying under the full weight of Adora’s body and the heat burns her from the inside out, pooling low in her abdomen. Just seconds ago, Adora was an adorable, bumbling idiot, but now she seemed so self-assured, or at the very least not nearly as shy as Catra felt. She’d never done this before. </p><p>When Adora’s tongue swipes over her lower lip, followed immediately by her teeth, there was no way to stop the noise from escaping her throat. There was no way she could have known that would happen. Her cheeks burned with the rest of her, but she quickly forgot her embarrassment, now revelling in the way Adora’s tongue felt. When it pushed inside, she didn’t know what else to do -she sucked on it. The moan it earned from Adora sent another wave of flames over her body. This is so hot. Fuck. She’s so hot. </p><p>Catra’s hands shifted, one making its way to the blonde’s hair and the other sliding around the back of her neck, trying to pull her closer. It partially worked. They couldn’t really get any closer, but Adora pressed herself down into Catra, grinding their hips together. Shit. She lets her nails play against Adora’s scalp -which she seems to like, a LOT -earning more pressure from those hips. </p><p>Adora kept herself propped on one elbow, shifting only slightly to allow the other hand to rest gently on the brunette’s hip, which nearly caused a yelp of surprise. Adora pulls her head back and Catra bites back a whine. She never wants this to end. “Um, I’ve never...done this...before.” </p><p>Riding whatever high the other girl has given her, the truth comes out before Catra has a chance to paint it to fit some alternative narrative. “Ditto.” As soon as she sees Adora’s eyes widen, she regrets it. </p><p>“But, at the party, when I found you, you said-” </p><p>“I know.” A moment passes where Adora just seems to be searching for answers. Catra continues to play with her hair and runs her other hand over the back of her shoulders, trying to <br/>distract her and bring her back. But she doesn’t move. “I guess...I just wanted you to think I was cool or some shit.” </p><p>Adora gives an unexpectedly quirked smile. “You did?” She nods in response. “Well...I dunno about cool, but...I thought you were really attractive.” </p><p>“You were totally drunk. You probably thought everyone was attractive.” </p><p>“Not everyone, but especially you.” </p><p>“Why especially me?” </p><p>“You just have this...way.” </p><p>Catra gives up the assault on Adora’s hair -she’s clearly losing this fight and the mood has already shifted to something she’s far less comfortable with. Instead she chooses to make a mental map of the silhouette of Adora’s face and neck. “Hm?” </p><p>Adora sighs. “Don’t get me wrong, you can be super annoying -” </p><p>“Hey! I resent that.” </p><p>“-BUT, you also just give off this vibe. It’s like...confidence, but not. Like nothing can touch you.” </p><p>She raised her eyebrows. “You’re touching me right now.” </p><p>“And that’s kind of crazy to me.” </p><p>How? How could that be crazy? If anything, it was crazy that her fuck-you-world demeanor could be attractive. She was standoffish to keep people out, not bring them in. If anything, Adora was crazy for thinking that. AND she was crazy for thinking she didn’t deserve better. THAT was crazy. But Catra should just be grateful, right? “Ask me.” </p><p>“What?” </p><p>“Ask me out again.” </p><p>Adora gives an audible swallow. “Would you go on a date, with me?” </p><p>“Yes.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Not sure how many more chapters I'll write for this, only because I don't really have a clear plot line so it's hard to keep momentum going -and I have a bunch of other prompts to work on, including finishing the trial portion of With You, which...why are trials so complicated??? Who knew there was so much to learn? Not I.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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